Dating App Clichés We’re All A Little Bit Guilty Of
A dating app with a difference.
Those first giddy days and weeks on a dating app are precious.
You’re young, eager, full of hope, and ready to find love. There’s no selfie that isn’t worth saving and no bio that doesn’t get a laugh. Hell, you probably even threw a ‘Live, Laugh, Love’ in your bio and snagged a couple of matches!
But it doesn’t take long to realise that how you set up your profile could be the difference between a lifetime of happiness and watching your potential future squeeze pass you by. Let’s face it, the stakes are high, and true love waits for no one, which is probably why we lean on clichés when the search gets serious.
And that’s okay! We’ve all done it, hun. We’re all just out here, looking for love and hoping someone really does want to know how tall we are.
Because we know we’re all in this together, we’ve rounded up some of the clichés we’re all a little bit guilty of peddling.
Saying you like “travelling”
Traveller’s are sexy. They’re all tanned and chilled and know how to make a killer Vietnamese omelette thanks to that cooking class they took in Hoi An. We totally get that you’d wanna slap that label on your profile.
And you should! But why not make it interactive? Use your bio to pose questions like, “Tell me your favourite country?” or “Where’s your dream travel destination? Mine’s ______”. It’s a great conversation starter and will make your profile much more personal. Who knows? Maybe you’ll end up finding yourself a travel partner.
your dating profile: i LOVE adventures
me: sounds like i’d have to do stuff. next–>
— chuuch (@ch000ch) January 25, 2016
Look, putting “Gemini” in your bio probably isn’t the filtering technique you think it is. If we’re being honest, no guy or gal is going to see your star sign and think, “Oh nah I’m a Pisces, that won’t work”.
But if you’re into astrology (that Co-Star app isn’t on your phone for nothing), it can provide valuable insight into the way a person sees themselves. In addition to listing your own sign, try listing a couple of your own best qualities rather than the ones the zodiac dictates. It’ll give your matches greater an idea of what they might have in common with you. Trust us, the more specific, the more appealing.
What to expect when dating a Scorpio pic.twitter.com/UlekIgJHQ9
— Manny (@dasomenu) November 1, 2019
Photos with fish
We love puns and we get that you’re trying to reel in matches, we do. The great hope is that a potential match will see a fish snap and think, “Is my name yellowfin tuna? Cos I just got hooked!”
Honestly, whatever your feelings about fishing, we’re just impressed so many of you have done it on enough occasions for there to be photographic evidence.
Every dude’s dating app profile really be like:
Picture with fish
Picture with car
Picture with small human
Some oddly off putting and very cheesy but supposed to endearing bio about making a girl his wife
“THE KID IN THE PICTURE IS NOT MINE”
— Emm (@emmbueh) October 19, 2019
Putting your height in your bio
Look, tbh, maths gives me anxiety and trying to convert feet and inches into some kind of measurement I actually understand is a little too much to ask of me when I’m looking for love on a dating app, but we all do it because… it’s the done thing, I guess?
If anything, poking fun at your height or appearance will get you so many more matches than listing it. If you’re tall, go for “professional light-bulb changer”, or if you’re short – which isn’t a bad thing – say, “5’1, but this will be the last time you stoop so low”. If you can be open-minded and make fun of yourself, we promise you’ll get more matches than a pack of Redheads.
I have never met a guy who is actually 5’9, 5’9 is just the height guys put on their bios because they think anything else is too short and they are in denial about being 5’7
— Tahlia Pritchard (@Tahls) January 28, 2020
Photos with dogs
Show me a guy or a girl who doesn’t melt over a good doggo pic, and I’ll show you a liar. Any sort of photo with a cute canine will make you exponentially hotter by association and probably get you an immediate match, and that’s just science.
However, if you’re going to do this, please make sure you ACTUALLY own a dog/have a deep love for dogs and aren’t just exploiting people’s weakness for a quick match.
Trust me, in this dog-love-dog world, phonies get caught out real quick.
“I texted this boy I like but I used a semi-colon as a power move and I think I scared him off” – my sister, 25
— Anthony Oliveira (@meakoopa) December 26, 2017
Anything referring to pizza
Pizza, pizza puns, pizza emojis. We get it – we all love pizza.
But we reckon you’ll appear more enticing if you opt for a joke that’s much more unique/specific to you. Try something like, “Roses are red, butter chicken is red. Poems are hard. Butter chicken”.
The more creative you are, the more matches you’ll reel in.
men on dating apps: LOOKING FOR MY PARTNER IN CRIME. A DOWN TO EARTH GIRL. LETS SKIP THE SMALLTALK AND GO STRAIGHT TO A FIRST DATE. ALL BAR ONE. PLANNING MY NEXT TRIP TO SOUTH AMERICA. WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET. NANDOS. SIX PHOTOS OF ME TAKEN FROM BELOW. ARCTIC MONKEYS.
— beth mccoll (@imteddybless) February 19, 2019
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(Lead image: GaudiLab / Shutterstock)