Golden (and goofy) moments from the Paris Olympics so far
Well, we’re not even a week in and the Olympics 2024 is already serving; and while I’d prepared myself to get swept up in the emotion and excitement of the Games, I had completely forgotten how silly the whole thing could be.
It’s honestly a fascinating examination of the full range of the human condition, from the athletes that push the limits of what a body can achieve, to the fans in the stadium doing the robot to the dismay of commentators. Literally anything could happen.
Here are some of my personal highlights from the first few days:
The campest opening ceremony:
Paris really did that.
The Opening Ceremony sprawled across the City of Light and delighted the world, leaning into French stereotypes and camping them up in a major way for a laugh at our expense. I love it.
Marie’s noggin. Image credit: BBC
Can-Can dancers along the Seine. A singing, beheaded Marie Antoinette. French rockstars Gojira performing “a metal rendition metal rendition of ‘Ah! Ca Ira’, a song synonymous with the French Revolution.” Explosions of red, white and blue smoke over the Pont d’Austerlitz bridge. The french culture was displayed hysterically and I commend the organisers for just fucking going ham.
Sure, but how do we make it even campier? Throw in Lady Gaga serving Moulin Rouge and THEE Celine Dion making her triumphant comeback atop the Eiffel Tower (side note, if you weren’t sobbing during that moment then you’re dead inside).
Celine Dion Olympics opening ceremony performance. Image credit: @olympics Instagram
Finally, the celebration of queer joy, with drag queen performances, voguing and of course, the interpretation of the Greek God Dionysus that made conservatives around the world shake in their loafers.
Image Credit: The Olympic Games/X
No notes, if you ask me. Well, other than the incorrect response from the loafer lads.
The golden (and silver) girlies:
As of today, six out of the nine Australian medals have gone to women. YEAH THE GIRLS.
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While it’s wonderful to see any Aussie achieve their dream, there’s something particularly special about watching the women in all their glory. It could be something to do with the misogyny female athletes have to face daily, or it could just be my own personal preference. Who knows? Not me!
Jess Fox at the Paris Olympics. Image credit: @ausolympicteam Instagram
Placing gold and silver in swimming, road cycling and canoeing, Australian athletes Grace Brown, Jessica Fox, Mollie O’Callaghan, Ariane Titmus, Emma Mckeon, Meg Harris and Shayna Jack have all achieved their Olympic dreams. The strength and grace of these women has been an absolute joy to witness, and I love knowing that they’re such fantastic role models for all the young girls who are making the choice to dedicate their lives to competitive sport.
THE LIFEGUARD:
It’s said “not all heroes wear capes.” #BobtheCapCatcher is the hero that barely wears anything. My man deserves #Olympics gold?for walking out with the dad bod & diving in the pool to get a swimmer’s cap. Best moment of the Games so far in my book ? #dadbod #OlympicGames pic.twitter.com/1wV5xirkzL
— ??Eric Seals (@ericseals) July 28, 2024
Sorry, but this is the hottest thing I’ve ever seen!?
I don’t care for the “dad-bod” commentary one bit, but this man is a hero and a saint and I applaud him and need everyone to catch up with my obsession.
Noticing a rogue cap in the Olympic pool, the unnamed lifeguard stripped down to his speedos, dove into the pool and retrieved the goods.
The crowd went wild and he is my official Olympic mascot.
Simone Biles’ triumphant return:
Golden girl/GOAT Simone Biles has returned to the Olympics, three years after suffering the “twisties” in Tokyo and having her confidence shattered (which is arguably better than her neck/spine).
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Despite an early injury with her leg, Simone posted “an all-around total of 59.566 during the first day of the women’s artistic gymnastics qualifying.” This means nothing to me but I believe it is very impressive.
The 27-year-old gymnastics star entered Bercy Arena to a rousing response from the crowd, her fans thrilled to see her looking happy, relaxed and focused. The women’s finals are scheduled for July 31 at 2:15am Aus-time for those die-hard fans, and whether or not Biles wins gold, her participation at the Games is a huge personal victory.
The robot:
So this happened.
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“If you just keep an eye on, well… maybe not that,” the commentator states, watching this unidentified blonde woman SHINE from the stands. I don’t know who she is, but I am not alone in my support of this icon.
Image credit: @thecut Instagram
You can tune into coverage of the Paris Olympic Games 2024 on Channel 9, 9Now and Stan.
Written by Lil Friedmann, who can’t do a double back salto tucked with a triple twist, but can write a 10/10 article. You can follow her at @lilfriedmann on socials.
Image credit: Getty + Punkee