LMAO: Tonight’s Bachelor Cliffhanger Ep Retold Through Its Funniest Tweets
Another day, another ep of The Bachelor to quietly obsess over. This episode promised drama and it didn’t quite deliver.
Sure, there was a two-on-one date with Jen and Liz, Sian threatened to walk-out while crossing the fourth wall… but: DO WE EVEN CARE ABOUT THESE PEOPLE?!
Short answer: no.
It’s much more enjoyable following the live-tweets for tonight cliffhanger ep; which were especially hilarious.
The Bachelor episode 5, as told through its funniest tweets:
The solo date with Florence was pretty dull.
Matty if you're wondering what a girl is "looking for" on #TheBachelorAU, the answer is always "a career as an Instagram influencer"
— Keegs (@keegs) August 9, 2017
Ahhh Matty, if you're asking Florence she is on The Bachelor to find love (permanent residency) just ask! #TheBachelorAU #BachelorAU
— Steph Andrews (@sometimeseasame) August 9, 2017
This quote was great though:
'Abort mission you stupid bitch' literally the quote of the season #TheBachelorAU
— Scott Gadaleta (@SJGadaleta) August 9, 2017
But mostly it was just fist-making and weird sexual innuendo.
The secret to great GIFs is CONTEXT. #thebachelorAU pic.twitter.com/cYlbVqXX5R
— Osher Günsberg (@oshergunsberg) August 9, 2017
Uh…. this looks like it belongs on PornHub #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/R8OmzuxE86
— Lucia Peta Riteman (@hidden_horcrux) August 9, 2017
The two-on-one date sucked because Matty picked the wrong girl to stay.
me in the car when my mum wont stop for maccas #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/XXb0yROWw0
— Carly Heading (@carlyylalaa) August 9, 2017
Date goals: drinking champagne on an awkward double date, at a tiny table, in a dimly lit haunted mansion #TheBachelorAU
— Meg Rayner (@megrayner) August 9, 2017
When Matty keeps psycho Jen and sends home the other girl because she doesn't want his babies after meeting like once #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/fM14S8QCvq
— Tina Burke (@teeburke_) August 9, 2017
Jen when she pulled her fabricated personality out of a hat and left Liz stunned #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/D3qutMvVdZ
— Juanita (@VelcroVSlace) August 9, 2017
Liz: I wasn't going to be a performing seal.
Meanwhile Jen be like… #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/sgmlF5Nizz— Mackenzie Ravn (@mackenzieravn) August 9, 2017
Jen then lied through her teeth to the girls, about what happened on the date.
He said I was really beautiful and really confident and he really liked the way I cure cancer and invented the telephone. #TheBachelorAU
— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) August 9, 2017
omg jen #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/VURSjl5YME
— Jamie Renee (@jamiereneeh) August 9, 2017
Jen was 100% the girl in high school who had contacted books with no air bubbles and who told you Supre was "French for slut" #TheBachelorAu
— Gina Rushton (@ginarush) August 9, 2017
Flo gets a rose – the girls cheer. Jen gets a rose – crickets #TheBachelorAU
— Annie Clark (@anniefitness) August 9, 2017
Then at the cocktail party, some woman called Sian (who??) was threatening to leave because.. well, she says she didn’t like Matty anyways. In the end, she stuck around. Sigh.
It was drama no one particularly cared about.
Sian: *crying* I don't like him and I don't like this process
Also Sian: ok I got Matty's attention I can stay now.#TheBachelorAU— Courtney Gould (@heyycourtt) August 9, 2017
Sian: I want to leave
Matt: Sure go for it
Sian: OMG thank you so much I'll stay#TheBachelorAU— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) August 9, 2017
"I HONESTLY CAN'T BELIEVE THIS REALITY TV SHOW IS PUTTING CAMERAS IN MY FACE. SHOCKED AND APPALLED." – Sian (2017) #TheBachelorAU
— I stole the pootie (@phoebeacummings) August 9, 2017
Please tell me Matty isn't going to have a mental breakdown over a woman he only knew about today #thebachelorau
— Kiera (@UnderYourPorch) August 9, 2017
That bloody non-ending was clearly intended to torture viewers. How dare you do this to us, Channel Ten.
How many of you feel personally victimised by the way the Bachelor ended tonight #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/7Aap4PksDE
— C (@sunblushlouis) August 9, 2017
You did NOT just to be continued us you cliffhanger-loving motherbastards #TheBachelorAu
— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) August 9, 2017
um excuse me @TheBachelorAU @oshergunsberg #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/fYa78SQjPG
— Lauren Rose (@laurennrosie) August 9, 2017