An Exhaustive Ranking Of Iconic Aussie Lunch Food From Garbage To God-Tier

While not everyone has the most positive memories associated with primary and high school, we can all agree that the snack foods shared around recess and lunch were the best part.

There are a number of lunchbox staples that I would happily still eat during my work lunch breaks in current times. But apparently it’s “creepy” and “borderline psychopathic” to sip up on a juice box, while snacking down on a Roll-Up and a packet of Dunkaroos at my desk. Rude!

A grown-ass woman should be allowed to eat her weight in Cheesy Strings without society’s judgement.

If you’re looking for a comforting dose of childhood nostalgia, we’ve rounded up all the foods you probably copped in your lunchbox if you went to school in Australia — and ranked accordingly.

An exhaustive ranking of iconic Australian lunch food from garbage to God-tier:

34. Eucalyptus Drops

These are the saddest sweet treats ever made. What are they? A candy for koalas? Eucalyptus Drops would haunt the classroom and still to this day, if I smell eucalyptus I’m deeply triggered.

33. Chicken Sandwich

Out of all the sandwich options you might find in a lunchbox, chicken has the least right being there. Chicken just doesn’t taste good unless it’s fresh out of the oven or fridge. When it’s been sitting around for hours, it develops a gross taste. Avoid!

32. K-Time Baked Twists

Rich teens loved to whip these out at recess, but these bars gave me Karen vibes.

31. Devon And Tomato Sauce Sandwich

Whether you were a fan of devon or maybe the dreaded face meat, slapping this nondescript meat in between two slices of bread and a generous lather of tomato sauce was basically Australian culture. But did it ever actually taste good? I say, nope! Tomato sauce does not belong in a sandwich that will be sitting around for hours until lunch — that’s just asking for a soggy sanga. No, thank you!

30. Fruit Wise

Did you just get triggered by the sight of this? These leathery straps of fruit were one of the worst things I’ve ever eaten.

29. Sultanas Boxes

Hard pass. (Yes, I’m that annoying person who picks sultanas out of Sultana Bran, what of it?)

28. Fruit Cup

Fruit Cups fill me with much-needed dose of childhood nostalgia but that’s where the good feelings end. They just don’t taste good.

27. Trail Mix

Slightly better than sultanas, but not by much. While eating trial mix as an adult is quite an exciting arvo snack, a box full of peanuts, cranberries, sultanas, and cashews didn’t exactly ooze cool in the playground.

26. Pop Tops

I have no solid argument against Pop Tops, but I think they’re the worst out of the schoolyard drink options.

25. Vegemite Sandwich

Don’t take my Australian citizenship away, but Vegemite sandwiches are terrible. Don’t get me wrong, I like Vegemite. However, it’s a strong flavour that should be delicately applied to toast or a cracker and not slathered between bread, like you typically get with a sando.

24. Juice Boxes

Juice Boxes are better than Pop Tops. Fight me.

23. Cheese Stringers

I know these are a childhood fave but hear me out: they only taste good fresh out of the fridge. Once Cheese Stringers are left in your backpack for a few hours, they go all soft and melted — gross!

22. Go-Gurt

Go-Gurt is fine but it reminds me of guys that used to bully me, who would shoot it into their mouths like they were downing a shot of vodka. You’re super tough downing that strawberry yoghurt, Nathan!

21. Rice Cakes

Typically slathered with peanut butter or Vegemite/butter, these were the joyless lunch option for fussy kids. I was a fussy kid and I would eat four rice cakes with peanut butter every day for lunch for most of high school life.

20. Big M

When it comes to lunchbox drinks, nothing comes close to a School Smart Big M. Pro tip: freeze one of these badbois overnight and the next day you’ve got yourself a frappé and you’ll be the talk of the schoolyard (well, I thought I was anyway).

19. Fruit

Fruit can be great or it can be a disaster. It depends on the kind of fruit, but up the top has to be watermelon, strawberries, and bananas — these are crowd pleasers. Kiwi fruits are tasty but difficult to eat and you DO NOT want to be that weird kid seen eating the furry skin. Down the bottom are apples (basic!), mandarins (stinky!), pears (drippy!), and an orange is just an impractical fruit to be handling at school.

18. Fruit Bars

Ahhh, this is my childhood. Fruit bars are high risk, high reward: your parents could send you to school with a strawberry flavour and you’re flying high, or you get stuck with apricot and you’re hanging your head in shame. And don’t even get me started on orange!

17. Muesli Bars

Muesli bars come in many forms but they’re not all equal. Imho, yoghurt topped muesli bars or ones with choc chips inside are God-tier, while those Nature Valley crunchy bars (while tasty) will almost chip a tooth with each bite.

16. Jumpy’s

Now, we’re cooking! The rest of this list are all very tasty lunch options. Full disclosure: I’ve actually never eaten Jumpy’s before but I’ve heard glowing reviews and the kangaroo shapes have already won me over as I am easily amused.

15. Roll-Ups

Roll up, roll up, why don’t more adults eat Uncle Toby’s Roll-Ups? I mean, despite having very little nutritional value, they’re a lot of fun! What other food can you mould in various shapes before shoving into your gob?

14. Petit Miam

Real ones will remember the iconic above ad and the OG tiny buckets the yoghurt came inside — not this newfangled packaging.

13. Mini Shapes Packets

You can’t go wrong with a packet of Mini Barbecue or Pizza Shapes, or Chicken Crimpy if you want to get fancy. If you opted for Cheese and Bacon, then you can’t be helped.

12. LCMs

The following options are God-tier lunchbox staples. I was rarely allowed LCMs so now when I — a woman in her 30s — am shopping for groceries, I consider grabbing a box to be strictly off-limits.

11. Ham Sandwich

Just hear me out: the only meat worth putting on a sandwich is ham. This type of meat doesn’t worsen over time, in fact it tastes even better, especially with a bit of mustard to keep the bread moist.

10. Mamee Noodles

Okay, another full disclosure moment: I’ve never had Mamee Noodles in my life. Somehow, these passed me by in my school years but I can recognise an icon when I see one.

9. Tiny Teddies

Kings! I’m such a sucker for Tiny Teddies, and there’s nothing better than the half coated milk choccie variety.

8. Tic Toc Biscuits

Before Ke$ha sang ‘TiK ToK’ and a little niche app known as TikTok debuted, Arnott’s Tic Toc biscuits started it all. And how else would we have learned to tell the time?? (Probably by just looking at our phones tbh.)

7. Potato/Corn Chips

Any kid at school with a mini packet of chips was my new best friend.

6. Babybel

Cheese Stringers don’t come close to precious Babybel cheeses. The tiny cheese with big possibilities.

5. Homemade Baked Goods

Any kind of baked goods were a popular choice among students and personally, I couldn’t get enough of those cornflake biscuits the rich mums used to make their kids.

4. Le Snak

I’m low-key obsessed with how children’s snack foods from the ’90s/00s was often French. Between Petit Miam and Le Snaks, I guess kids are just morphing into a bunch of Madelines. Sacré bleu! All shade aside, Le Snaks do slap.

3. Nutella Sandwich

I’m ready to fight anyone who thinks that a Nutella sandwich is not the superior school sandwich. Sure, there’s not much nutritional benefit, but it tastes great and gives you street cred.

2. Ovalteenies

The best! I don’t even know what they are but I will hoover a whole packet down my throat like a complete madwoman.

1. DunkaRoos

It’s dunkin’ time! In my day, there was no snack as popular as the humble Dunkaroos. It’s simple but effective: sweet biscuit and hazelnut dip. Slam dunk! This is as good as it gets.

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I don’t know about you but I’m hungry.