#PutOutYourPotPlants: The Bachelorette Finale Retold Through The Best Tweets
It’s over. Dunzo. Gone. But never forgotten. Sophie Monk’s spectacular season of The Bachelorette was everything we could have hoped for and much more.
The entire thing could have been a car crash, ut was held together by the utter magic that is Sophie Monk. She is a superstar and Australia’s greatest gift. Treasure her forever.
Anyways, the finale kicked off with the typical meeting of Sophie’s family, before each dude got their last single date.
Jarrod’s was nice enough, taking a helicopter to a sandbank in the Fijian sea. Surely that guy is still nursing some hectic sunburn from the shadeless island.
However, Stu’s date was much more intimate and viewers quickly clicked that he’d be the final man standing. It was practically a big weird porno with the loved up couple breathing all over each other. The chemistry was fire.
At the final, it seemed that poor ol’ Jarrod didn’t see it coming and it was torture to watch Sophie pull out his still-beating heart.
The whole season has been fantastic but made all the better because of the hilarious folks on Twitter. Never change.
The finale of The Bachelorette retold through its funniest tweets:
Stu and Jarrod meet Sophie’s family, it was mostly just a chance for Stu to shittalk his prior life.
"I haven't been this happy in 20 years. Maybe ever".
His kids:#BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/Hwm1iwIdfe— Meg ???? (@avengermegs) October 26, 2017
Stu: I haven't been happy in 20 years
Stu's kids: Cheers dad, enjoy the nursing home you flog. #BacheloretteAU— Sophie (@Sophiebonbophie) October 26, 2017
Stu’s kids this whole episode: #BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/zuuhFT3rdL
— ATOMIC BLONDE (@svpphic) October 26, 2017
Stu: "I'm 44, have kids, a vasectomy and I'm already married"
Sophie's family:
#BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/6R0rsBhlnV— AtomicNicky (@AtomicNicky) October 26, 2017
The choice seemed obvious enough.
Who will she CHOOSE?! A man worth half a billion dollars or a terrifyingly possessive giraffe who somehow sunburns indoors #BacheloretteAU
— Gina Rushton (@ginarush) October 26, 2017
Queensland Police are preparing to extradite any offenders from interstate who ruin the #BacheloretteAU finale #PleaseNotJarrod #daylightspoilings
— Queensland Police (@QldPolice) October 26, 2017
Guys I made an intense Jarrod collage for you to look at during the ad breaks. #BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/HXnFXiErcj
— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) October 26, 2017
I think I’ve cracked a case. Ray Liotta + KD Lang = Stu Laundy #BacheloretteAU @oshergunsberg pic.twitter.com/WbfOHTbOS0
— Autocorrect (@JazzPineapple) October 26, 2017
Jarrod’s date involved a dinner in the sea and Jarrod spilling his heart out.
If they don't have four full buckets of factor nine hundred sunscreen this will end badly for Jarrod. #BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/3T1rywnIIY
— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) October 26, 2017
For the love of Banana Boat somebody give Jarred some sunscreen. #bacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/65yOldCLBz
— Jelisa Apps (@JelisaApps) October 26, 2017
We could have been watching a shirtless Apollo on the beach instead of one of these schmuks THANKS FOR NOTHING SOPHIE #bacheloretteAU
— Another 37 years???????? (@PollyMaeve) October 26, 2017
I’ve had enough. I want a chance at real love. I’m the new Plantchelorette. Applications open soon. #BacheloretteAU #Plantchelorette pic.twitter.com/yWGHqS29DP
— Jarrod’s Plant (@jarrodsplant) October 26, 2017
Stu’s date was typically boring.
Sorry to ruin your evening but I've thought about this all season: Stu looks like that time Shrek became a semi-hot farmer #BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/vQJtCZ4KPs
— Tina Burke (@teeburke_) October 26, 2017
How did that sea plane take off with all Stu’s baggageon board? ????#bacheloretteau
— Gem ???? (@ggemmmmmma) October 26, 2017
I would rather watch Apollo talk about bread sticks for eternity than see Stu try talk about his feelings again #BacheloretteAU
— Kristen Amiet (@KrissiAmiet) October 26, 2017
Jarrod’s heart was smashed into a million pieces as Sophie broke the sad news to him.
Sophie's choice: a dude who owns lots of pubs, or a dude who owns a vineyard. I'm sorry, but either option is a win. #BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/0eXIhwHTEX
— Natalie Hardwicke (@NatHardwicke) October 26, 2017
God I hope she tells them both to piss off and runs away with a cocktail waitress. #BacheloretteAU
— Virginia Trioli (@LaTrioli) October 26, 2017
SOPH PLEASE REJECT BOTH AND MARRY YOURSELF. #BacheloretteAU
— Zan Rowe (@zanrowe) October 26, 2017
Jarrod ten minutes from now #bacheloretteau pic.twitter.com/xGjJq6wJ95
— ChristopherGJK (@ChristopherGJK) October 26, 2017
This will be the Ralph Wiggum that can be seen from space. #BacheloretteAU
— Jo Thornely (@jothornely) October 26, 2017
Jarrod walks straight into the ocean #BacheloretteAU
— Bhakthi (@bhakthi) October 26, 2017
Everybody put your pot plants out for Jarod tonight #BacheloretteAU
— S K (@kokolovesbooks) October 26, 2017
Stu wins. We all knew it was coming.
Man with massive yacht and $500 million in the bank wins heart of blonde woman from the Gold Coast #BacheloretteAU pic.twitter.com/oDXciKpJwK
— Dave (@Cranky_Dave) October 26, 2017
Still not too late to pick the dugong Sophie #BacheloretteAU
— Courtney Gould (@heyycourtt) October 26, 2017
It’s so heartwarming to know that white male millionaires in their late 40s can still sometimes find love. #BacheloretteAU
— Leonard (@LforLeonard) October 26, 2017