15 Questions I Had After Rewatching The Live-Action ‘Bratz’ Movie

The pop culture world went through a massive reset after the Bratz girlies with the “passion 4 fashion” hit the toy aisle. From the platform boots to the matching sets, many girls craved to be like Bratz dolls. And with such success, it was inevitable that the dolls would be pushed into other business ventures including video games, TV shows, and movies.

In 2007, the Bratz fandom got its first and only live-action movie of the dolls. Bratz (the movie) was perfect for its time, with its ’00s fashion and campy dialogue. But after rewatching it in 2022, I have so many questions about the film that I probably won’t ever get answered.

To share my confusion with you all, here are 15 questions I had after watching 2007’s Bratz:

1. Why does Jade have a secret closet and wouldn’t her parents know about it?

In my opinion, the opening scene of Bratz is one of the most iconic moments in ’00s chick flick history.

The girls are getting ready together via webcam/Skype when Jade complains about how she doesn’t have anything to wear — until she pulls a secret shoe that leads to another closet. What makes this scene so confusing is that as she is moving the shoe, Jade looks around, as if someone is watching her do it.

Like, wouldn’t Jade’s parents already know because they bought the house?

2. Why didn’t Jade just get changed in the bathroom?

After that whole opening number, Jade stuns me once again after she makes the girls huddle in order for her to change clothes. Like, surely everyone could see her literally butt naked in front of the whole school?

That’s definitely one way to make a first impression.

3. Did they just rip off Mean Girls? 

Meredith, who is the main antagonist of the film, is introduced to the audience as someone who is the HBIC (Head Bitch In Charge) of the high school and wants to keep the status quo.

She shows a seating plan of their school’s cafeteria with cliques sectioned into tables which is extremely reminiscent of Janice Ian’s high school map in Mean Girls. 

4. Why is there a statue of the principal in front of the school?

Although this sculpture becomes an important part of the plot later on, I just thought it was super random. What makes it funny is that there’s only a statue of him and none of any other previous principals. He’s obviously the most special principal that school has ever seen.

5. What’s up with Yasmin’s brother?

Although younger siblings are annoying from time to time, sometimes I just wanted to deck Yasmin’s little bro, Manny. He looks like he just came out of Jersey Shore and is a massive creep throughout the movie.

We later discover that he is obsessed with Meredith’s sister who is about 11 years old. Manny is in high school — yet he is sooo in love with this literal child. Yikesss.

6. How come Cloe can do a bicycle kick perfectly but her whole personality revolves around being a clutz?

Cloe is known to not have the best coordination. Literally in one of her first scenes she knocks over the whole bicycle rack at school. Nek minit, she’s bending it like Beckham. Make it make sense, ploise!

7. What kind of experiments is Jade doing?

When I was in high school, we rarely did any lab work around chemistry, and when we did it was super boring. However, Jade is over here making damn fireworks fly out of test tubes!

In the lab scene, she does list the ingredients she put in the test tubes, so can someone verify if mixing that combo creates portable fireworks?

8. Why the hell did Yasmin say that????

One of the most memorable scenes of Bratz is Yasmin’s first cringe-worthy interaction with Dylan, who is deaf. The whole scene demonstrates how Yasmin is just a massive A-hole and what’s even more unlikely is that they become love interests in the movie.

Watch below to ride the cringe wave with me:

9. The whole food fight scene? Like whaaa?

One of the major climax points in this movie is the food fight that finally reunites the girls after they drifted apart due to their assigned social cliques.

There are so many questions that I have for this scene. Like, why did no one help Jade as soon as Cloe’s food dropped on her? Why was there sooo much spaghetti?? And is the vice principal the principal’s bodyguard???

10. Why are the Bratz posing in detention like that?

Straight after the food fight scene and them allegedly destroying the principal’s statue, the girls are chucked into some arvo detention. But why are they all posing like that? Like, Cloe standing on the table for no reason has me bloody deceased!!

Also, where is the teacher running this detention shift?

11. Why did they do Cloe dirty with the outfit change?

Jade has the strongest passion for the fashion, and in one scene she transforms the girls’ clown costumes into “clown couture”, however the only one that stands our like a sore thumb is Cloe’s makeover.

Yasmin, Sasha, and Jade look absolutely stunning and definitely look like something out of the real Bratz dolls collection. Meanwhile, Cloe is stuck with green flares and a flat skirt. The Bratz factor would’ve jumped out more if they were matching imho.

12. How come Meredith’s song did not chart?

As much as I loathed Meredith as the villain, her musical numbers were FIRE!

Her song ‘Fabulous’ was an absolute track and her musical number at the end ‘All About Me’ was so catchy. I think the only reason why I hated it when I was younger was because it was Meredith — and we’re made to dislike her over-the-top behaviour. But she’s truly a queen.

Also her ‘Fabulous’ scene reminds me of Britney Spears’ ‘Slave 4 U’ and ‘Circus’ music videos. Love, love, love it.

13. Overall, who allowed Meredith to carry on and basically segregate groups in the school?

I understand that she’s the school principal’s daughter but don’t like, high schools have any teachers to monitor the welfare of students? I swear this behaviour would not fly at all in 2022.

14. Why didn’t ‘Bratitude’ chart as well?

This song has been stuck in my head for DAYZ, especially the part when it gets to the Spanish fusion mix of the song. The musical numbers in this movie need more love and, of course, the message of this song is a lot better than Meredith’s.

15. Janel Parrish, aka Jade, aka Mona from Pretty Little Liars, can sing?

If you stay to the very very end, Jade has her own singing solo and it’s actually really good. I’m going to give Bratz its props for attempting to create its own fire soundtrack. The only thing I kinda dislike from all of this is the music video.

Who’s idea was it to put Mona, I mean Jade, in front of a window with THE Windows default desktop background?

For me personally, I wish they made a sequel to this movie. I’d love to know what would happen if the girls finally made the Bratz magazine, just like in the cartoon!