A Categorical List Of Celebrities Who Are Definitely Probably Lizard People

Behind all the glitz and glam, celebrities play such a vital role in the functionality of well, everything.

Some celebs use their riches to assist the less fortunate, some use their enormous platform to voice political opinions and others (most) are straight-up shape-shifting alien reptiles on a quest for world domination. It’s the lizard people’s world. We’re just living in it.

Come along, friend, as we explore on of the greatest conspiracies of our time.

What Is A Lizard Person?

Exactly what it sounds like.

Lizard people are cold-blooded humanoid reptilians who have the power to shape-shift into human form. They are creatures from another dimension who possess reptile-like bodies, but blend into the crowd by taking on a more humanoid appearance, according to author and conspirer David Icke’s book, The Biggest Secret: The Book That Will Change the World.

They use holographic technology to disguise themselves as everyday humans, and often rise to high levels of power in order to manipulate the masses.

According to prominent theorists — who very much believe in our lizard overlords — they’ve been around since ancient times, and have sunk their claws is many of history’s most powerful world leaders.

How Can You Tell If Someone’s A Reptilian Shapeshifter?

• Reptilian eyes can be seen if you look closely enough. Some say it’s possible to spot them only in the midst of shapeshifting.
• Scales or hints of green may be seen on the skin while a reptilian is transforming into its humanoid state.
• Hologram flickers. Reptilians are so good at hiding their identities that they often. forget they’re hiding such a big green scaly secret. Sometimes their disguise can become more apparent when their hologram skin glitches.
• Your intuition may alert you of a nearby reptilian.

So now you’re in the know and are equipped with the skills to spot them, who are some of almost definite shape-shifting alien reptiles among us?

#1 Justin Bieber

One of the most famous reptilian humanoids at the minute is Justin Bieber. Theories of Biebs being a lizard have been thrown around for a while, but piqued last year when he was touring Australia for his Purpose tour.

He toured Sydney, Brisbane, Melbourne and Perth. It’s the Perth visit that had conspirers shooketh.

Supposedly, Justin let himself slip up in front of hundreds of fans, exposing himself as a “giant reptile”.

This article from Perth Now was supposedly published then quickly taken down. Did Bieber’s management pull the story? Probably. The story claims that police were called by distressed fans who saw “gross, coloured scales” all over Bieber’s body.

Need more proof? Check out this video of “Justin” revealing his true reptilian eyes.

Illuminati  Reptilian confirmed.

#2 Queen Elizabeth II

Writer, public speaker and famous conspiracy theorist David Icke has spoken at length about how he believes that Queen Elizabeth II is in fact a shape-shifting lizard from outer space, and honestly, I believe him.

Icke — who very much subscribes to the illuminati conspiracy that a secret society of earth’s most powerful people controls the world — claimed in a 1991 interview that the British royal fam are descended from a reptilian blood line.

He also believes that members of the illuminati, including all of earth’s royal families, are descendants of ancient hybrids between reptilian aliens and humans. Also, let’s not forget, her name is Elizabeth. Lizzy for short. Is Lizzy short for LIZARD!? I will let you decide.

#3 Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus is a living legend. Hannah Montana was iconic, Bangerz low-key slapped and we honestly just want the best for her. But alas, even our faves aren’t immune to being secret big-as-shit reptiles trying to take over the world.

The biggest piece of ~evidence~ comes from an interview Miley did with Barbara Walters back in December 2013.

If you watch carefully, you can see that her right eye’s pupil narrows into a vertical slit, much like that of a lizard.

I for one welcome our new lizard queen. Yes bitch. Werk.

#4 Donald Trump

Eugh, this troll. I mean… wow… the leader of the Free World. Look, I am going to keep this one short and sweet because let’s be real, he doesn’t need the air time.

Lizard people possess a very specific and advanced set of skills. How else does it make sense that an incompetent, garbage, manbaby is the leader of the free world?

Oh there’s also this video, if you don’t already believe me.

#5 Mark Zuckerberg

Is Zucc a robot? Is he an alien? Is he a turtle? One thing’s for sure, he’s is sure as hell not human.

Rumours abound suggesting that Zuckerberg, the CEO of Facebook, is in fact a lizard person, and for good reason. He’s so weird. The way he talks and reacts to situations is just… not human.

And this isn’t us being mean! I’m sure he’s a really sweet lizard who is totally not harvesting our personal data.

Mark denied these allegation during a Q & A he posted to Facebook 2016.

Who are you trying to fool, “Mark”?

So there you guys go. Now that you’re equipped with the cold hard facts, what do you believe?