Chappell Roan is allowed to say no
This morning, pop sensation Chappell Roan (whose real name is Kayleigh Rose Amstutz) took to TikTok to deliver a powerful message to her 2.9m fans.
The 26-year-old American singer, who is known for her artistic, drag-inspired aesthetic, fronted the camera sans makeup, wearing a black tee with her hair tied back. While it feels reductive to comment on her appearance, it’s to highlight that this felt vulnerable. This wasn’t “your favourite artist’s favourite artist”, this was Kayleigh Rose.
Or, as she put it so perfectly, “a random bitch”.
“I need you to answer questions, just answer my questions for a second,” Chappell opened with in her first minute long video, asking fans to imagine seeing “a random woman on the street”.
@chappellroan ♬ original sound – chappell roan
“Would you yell at her from the car window? Would you harass her in public? Would you go up to a random lady and say, ‘Can I get a photo with you?’ And [when] she’s like, ‘No, what the fuck?’ and then you get mad at this random lady, would you be offended if she says no to your time because she has her own time? Would you stalk her family? Would you follow her around? Would you try to dissect her life and bully her online?”
Yikes.
“This is a lady you don’t know and she doesn’t know you at all. Would you assume that she’s a good person? Assume she’s a bad person? Would you assume everything you read about her online is true?” she continued, before powerfully ending with, “I’m a random bitch. You’re a random bitch. Just think about that for a second.”
The video at the time of reporting has 2.2m views.
@chappellroan Do not assume this is directed at someone or a specific encounter. This is just my side of the story and my feelings.
♬ original sound – chappell roan
The second video, currently sitting at 1.8m views, was accompanied by the caption, “Do not assume this is directed at someone or a specific encounter. This is just my side of the story and my feelings.” In this one minute clip, Chappell doubled down on her message.
“I don’t care that abuse and harassment, stalking, whatever is a normal thing to do to people who are famous or a little famous, whatever. I don’t care that it’s normal. I don’t care that this crazy type of behaviour comes along with the job that does not make it okay, that doesn’t make it normal. It doesn’t mean I want it, it doesn’t mean I like it,” Chappell states firmly, before growing animated with her frustration.
“I don’t want whatever the fuck you think you’re supposed to be entitled to. Whenever you see a celebrity, I don’t give a fuck if you think it’s selfish for me to say no for a photo or for your time or for a hug. That’s not normal. That’s weird. It’s weird how people think that you know a person just because you see them online or you listen to the art they make. That’s fucking weird. I’m allowed to say no to creepy behaviour.”
Damn. Well said, Chappell.
This year, the world fell in love with the “Midwest Princess”, and obsessed over her rise to fame and dominance. Everyone loves a success story, and learning of how she’s been building her career for almost a decade and finally gaining recognition made us fall in love with her even more.
But Chappell has been honest about her complex relationship to fame, and these TikToks aren’t the first time she’s commented on navigating the spotlight.
In a recent interview with Bowen Yang for Interview Magazine, Chappell lamented on the whirlwind she’s found herself in during 2024, and to me, it all sounds pretty isolating.
“I don’t know anyone who’s going through this, personally. The biggest thing has been getting recognised, and just feeling not myself. And touring, it’s all-consuming. I’ve never given a fuck about the charts or being on the radio, but it’s so crazy how industry people are taking me more seriously than before. I’m like, ‘I’ve been doing this the whole time, bitch’.”
In the same interview, she reflected on her recent performance at Brooklyn Pride, where she ripped her wig off mid-performance to feel more like herself.
“I was just like, this is really weird and really hard. In the past, honestly, eight weeks, my entire life has changed. It’s been really emotional because I’m not just singing pop music, it’s automatically political because I’m gay.”
Last month, during her interview on TikTok star Drew Afualo’s The Comment Section podcast, Chappell opened up about the elements of her life she missed prior to fame.
“Drugs in public! That’s what I miss. I miss frolicking, obviously, cos now I’m self-conscious to frolick. I miss, probably just being in Forever 21 and not being judged. I’m like, in disguise most of the time, but I just miss like, walking around being by myself,” she told Drew.
When it comes to our parasocial relationships with celebrities, it’s complicated. With the rise of social media and the bottom-line push for authenticity, we feel closer than ever to our favourite celebrities, and thus like we are entitled to more.
“Our exposure to celebrities is no longer limited to the press junkets accompanying a movie release or album drop – instead the steady drip-feed of social media bestows on us constant updates on the minutiae of their lives,” author Otegha Uwagba explored in her piece for The Guardian.
In an article for Time Magazine, journalist Angela Haupt opens by examining the changing nature of her relationship to the artists she used to make fan art for back in the 90s. “Thanks to TikTok and Instagram, I can tell you with authority what their kitchens look like, what their dogs are named, and what they put in their morning smoothies. Is it any wonder I feel like I know them?”
While I fear Chappell’s appeal to her fans will be met with backlash by the usual suspects (trolls who inherently detest celebrities and/or women), I genuinely hope the vulnerability in her message resonates with her fanbase. Artists are allowed to create and share their art, achieve commercial success and connect with their fans all whilst still feeling a sense of safety and privacy.
We’re all just random bitches, so stop making it fucking weird!!
Written by Lil Friedmann, a respectful fan girl. You can follow her at @lilfriedmann on socials.
Image credit: @ Instagram + Punkee