I Watched ‘Farmer Wants A Wife’ For The First Time & I Have Questions
As we all know by now Australia loves a good reality TV show, particularly one about people finding love. In this cold, crazy world, we need to all find collective joy in something.
Farmer Wants A Wife boasts the most successful relationship/baby-making ratio seen in Australian reality TV, with nine marriages and 20 babies. MAFS is shaking!
I was all keen to jump on board the Farmer Wants A Wife train this year, but then, well Bachelor In Paradise happened, and we’re only a very small team here at Punkee so Bachy took priority. However, with the Bachy franchise going back to a more doable two nights a week, and Farmer staying on Sunday and Monday nights, I finally decided to watch some of it.
So, first things first, it’s confusing coming into a show halfway through the season without having ever seen any of it before. I had no background info about any farmers, any of their sister wives, and how the process actually worked. All I knew is there wasn’t a girl kicked out every night in a rose ceremony, and that I could live with.
Every time I switch to Farmer Wants A Wife, some Farmer is lamenting about how he has to say goodbye to one of his three or four wives before ending the show by telling them he can’t make a decision
— Tahlia Pritchard (@Tahls) August 17, 2020
So while I am sure all these questions could be answered had I just watched the show from the beginning, maybe you, dear readers, can help shed some light on my numerous queries.
13 Questions I Had After Watching Farmer Wants A Wife For The First Time.
#1. Did this farmer leave because of a sad family storyline or because none of the women actually liked him romantically?
That may sound especially brutal given someone in his family died, but also, I just got the vibe none of his sister wives… liked him? Am I wrong?
#2. Why does this farmer have a weird hybrid accent?
I am not even sure the two above screenshots are even different men at this stage.
#3. Is this meant to be like a MAFS dinner party? Do they get as dramatic?
Show me someone pouring a glass of red wine over another person or GTFO.
#4. Why were they standing up to eat dinner at Nick’s house? Does he not own chairs?
I mean sometimes I stand up to eat dinner too but I normally call this, “I only got home five minutes ago and I need to eat my egg on toast before a new reality show starts again and I have to live-tweet.”
#5. Why do they all say “youse”? Isn’t there a better collective term for all your wives?
“I take youse, to be my wife…”
#6. Why does Justine always seem pissed off?
I’m sorry if it’s just her face, as someone with resting bitch face I should be more understanding.
#7. Do they all sleep in different rooms in their farmer’s house? Does anyone ever sneak in to see him in the middle of the night?
Do all these farmers even have enough bedrooms for all their wives? Do they all sleep in one big bed?
#8. Why do they all meet the farmer’s families together?!
“Mum, Dad, meet my three girlfriends, only one of who will survive this journey.”
#9. Wouldn’t it be slightly traumatic to meet your dad’s three girlfriends?!
These kids are heroes, just handling it like it’s another normal day.
#10. Why do all these men seem so confused by the concept of having to send someone home?
Some of these dudes are total fuck heads. Send someone home FFS.
“I just want to keep having fun with all of you a bit longer”….. grow the fuck up wanker, no wonder you’re still single. #FarmerWantsAWife #FarmerAU #Crisis
— ᗷᗴᑕ (@BecPrestwidge) August 10, 2020
Like, you can’t keep them ALL.
#11. Did every girl get a chance to go on single dates with the farmer?
For every episode I’ve watched, I’ve only ever seen the blonde girl go on a date with Farmer Alex.
#12. Why would you go on this show if you were scared of animals?
It’s like going on The Bachelor and being scared of roses or Osher Gunsberg.
#13. How is it the finale coming up and none of these farmers even seem slightly into their choices, let alone ready to be in love?
Between them all wanting to keep numerous girls around, none of them have convinced me yet they’re even slightly into one person.
#14. Is this season going to ruin the success rate of the show?
I thought it was hard to invest in Honey Badger’s journey to love, then I met Farmer Nick. Must be in the name.
#15. If Farmer Alex is still single after this, can he call me?
Don’t know shit about him, but he’s nice-looking.