20 Jul 2017

HAPPY B’DAY CLUELESS: Celebrating 22 Years Of Life Lessons From Cher Horowitz

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It’s been 22 years since Clueless came out… and oh my god, I’m totally buggin!

Two decades later and Cher Horowitz’s wisdom is as on point as ever. Who needs a life coach when you have Clueless? The 90’s film is still one of the most iconic teen films of all time and I would bet good money that we will never stop celebrating ‘Clueless Day’. It is a masterpiece and a 4eva fave.

The flick mastered a recipe for success: take a Jane Austen classic (Emma), bring it into the high school social scene of 1995 Beverly Hills, add ridiculously good-looking teens, styled in fabulously OTT fashion, with a killer leading lady and BAM. You’ve got a classic hit for all time.

We are eternally grateful for Cher and all the wisdom she imparted. So cheers Clueless, we owe you everything.

In celebration of Clueless on its 22nd anniversary, we’re revisiting all the most iconic life lessons we learnt from Cher:

Lesson #1 Road Rules

Don’t get too caught up with the “road rules”. Driving ain’t that hard, just check out Cher’s lit driving skills! Just don’t overthink it alright.

I mean, these “Stop” signs do give a pretty vague instruction. Who decides what qualifies as “stopping” and what doesn’t? You do you, Cher.

Plus when you hit a car (or a cyclist…) is it really necessary to stop and discuss?

We’ve all got places to be, you know, so sometimes you just gotta keep on keepin’ on.

Lesson #2 Get around politics

Cher’s political wisdom is pretty damn bang on. Besides the fact that she’s missing the mark a bit with her pronunciation of ‘Haitians’ (an unscripted mistake courtesy of Alicia Silverstone herself), Cher’s take on welcoming refugees is the kind of attitude we need to get around.

Cher for President.

Lesson #3 F*ck social stigma

Cher is not taking your peer pressure-infused, virginity-shaming shit guys. Let her be an example that whenever you choose to “lose your virginity,” is 100 percent up to you and there’s no reason to be ashamed about your personal preferences.

Cher is out there just owning her choices and demanding respect. Yeah guuurl!

Lesson #4 The art of seduction

While it turned out that Christian wasn’t exactly the right target audience (whoops), Cher’s tactics to seduce him were gold. Watch and learn people.

And always remember to play it cool.

Lesson #5 Dress to impress

First of all, I would just like to say how upsetting it is that 22 years later we still don’t have Cher’s outfit assembling programme. C’mon tech nerds, why you playin?

One of the most important things we learn from Cher is that a well-played outfit is very, VERY powerful. Cher’s outfits are more than just freakin’ fabulous, they’re strategic. Her fashion is iconic and we should all bow down to the master.

Lesson #6 School etiquette

Words to live by. Stay in school kids!

Lesson #7 Play your opponent’s weakness

If men are going to have the audacity to squirm at any mention of menstruation, then you should exploit their discomfort for your own gain. Cher gets it.

Lesson #8 Appreciate the little things

Cher doesn’t underrate the value of day to day tasks. We can all take a page out of Cher’s book and give ourselves more credit for just doin’ life, ya know. Self love girl, you’re killin’ it.

Lesson #9 Fake it till you make it

Lol. This is still the best.

Lesson #10 Self improvement takes work

Cher teaches us that you have to create a plan and make things happen. Her self improvement goals might seem superficial at first but she’s got the ambition and self discipline down. Plus she gets her how-to-be-a-good-person epiphany soon enough.