The Final Chaotic ‘MAFS’ Weddings Recapped In Tweets
Say goodbye to the wedding phase of Married at First Sight (well, until the predicted intruder nuptials) as things are about to get messy as the contestants attend their first dinner party.
That’s right, Monday night will hopefully be chaos. The first dinner party typically goes one of two ways: it’s boring-as-shit, or it’s a delightful dramatic night that will foreshadow what is yet to come this season.
But enough about Monday’s episode, last night welcomed the final four contestants into the experiment: 40-somethings pair Josh and Melissa, along with high power corporate couple Melinda and Layton.
Yep, a Melissa and a Melinda in one episode. If recapping this shitshow wasn’t enough to send me into a menty b, this show has served up two almost identical names – to me anyways, but I also get the names Chris and Nick mixed up. (Can you blame me?)
Thankfully, the two women couldn’t be more polar opposite with Melissa possibly being the horniest contestant ever cast on this show while Melinda is probably the least. But maybe that’s just what Layton brings out in his new wife – she does not like him one bit!
Let’s dive into the drama via the episode’s most relatable tweets, shall we then? We shall then!
The final weddings on Married at First Sight recapped in tweets:
It’s time for the final weddings! First we meet CEO, Layton, who is matched with successful businesswoman, Melinda. She’s looking for the “eternal love” that her grandparents had.
Why do I feel like Melinda has an Etsy store that sells lip gloss and calls herself a CEO? #mafs #mafsau
— Ben Shute (@Ben_Shute) February 5, 2023
Melinda has the energy of someone whose work mug says "BOSS BITCH" on it, and hangs a sign that says "Not before I've had my coffee" on her desk.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) February 5, 2023
The last couple we meet is Melissa, a horny hairdresser getting hitched to advertising director, Josh. They both have kids, they’re both in their 40s — it simply must be a perfect match. However, Josh loves rom-coms and Disney movies whereas Melissa just loves… sex.
A drink for every time Melissa tells us she’s a freak in the sheets #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/Oui5qHiogc
— Disco1975 (@Disco19752) February 5, 2023
Melissa and Josh meet at the altar and the vibes are wholesome… at first. Melissa ponders in a confessional if the size of his “hammer” reflects his shoe size. Meanwhile, Josh is quoting Notting Hill in his vows. Melissa’s friends reckon “she will eat him alive.”
Absolutely obsessed with Melissa thinking Josh is Thor, a win for all single middle aged dads.
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) February 5, 2023
Melissa: "My dream guy is Thor"….which one, hopefully this one because otherwise you are going to be disappointed as fuck! #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/jrMT1BVA71
— Colonel Kickhead (@colonelkickhead) February 5, 2023
Layton and Melinda meet at their wedding and IT IS awkward. Layton is keen but Melinda says separately that he “may be punching” and she would “swipe left” on a dating app if she saw him. From his vows, Melinda senses he’s self-entitled after he makes a comment about a “money tree”.
This girl needs to be matched up with Harrison immediately so they can add up to what they believe is 19.5 #mafs #mafsau
— Ben Shute (@Ben_Shute) February 5, 2023
Money on these two douche canoes find each other and cheat #MAFSAU #MAFS pic.twitter.com/cbXgYvAdYL
— so tired (Taylor’s Version) (@pjk27779) February 5, 2023
Imagine going on to MAFS and thinking you're too good for your partner.
You're literally on MAFS.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— So Dramatic! (@sodramaticpod) February 5, 2023
Ok I'm confused, are wedding vows meant to be someone just pouring out a list of how awesome they are because that seems to be what Melinda is running with #MAFS #MAFSAU
— Colonel Kickhead (@colonelkickhead) February 5, 2023
During the photoshoot, Melissa is goddamn gagging for it. But she’s in good company as Josh jokes about “getting an erection”. Meanwhile, Melinda continues to be disgusted by everything Layton does.
Layton: *breathes*
Melinda: He's so arrogant. I don't think it's gonna work.#MAFS #MAFSAU
— Married At First Sight Experts (@mafsexperts) February 5, 2023
“He’s trying to recruit a little army. He’s got tactics. He’s got a plan.”
Melinda may have got the end goal of this show mixed up with The Apprentice.#MAFSAU #mafs
— Poppy (@Poppy45854074) February 5, 2023
Wait for the 180 from Melinda when she finds out old mate has his own success & money. #MAFS
— DeluxeStormBorn™ (@deluxe_tm) February 5, 2023
Melissa’s friends worry that Josh is too boring. At the same time, Melinda’s friends try to convince her to give Layton a chance. Melinda already starts picking at him for, umm.. being a gentleman and trying too hard with her friends/family. Okay, sis!
“I really like him” #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/5czOEoNiAE
— Sarah (@hellosarah__) February 5, 2023
girl how are you in your 40s and still have toxic friends !! get rid of them immediately #MAFS #MAFSAU
— alysha ♡ (@intosneedy) February 5, 2023
The face of a very jealous person #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/I1eKUy5joA
— Becky Williams (@BIGNECKBECKS) February 5, 2023
The only blonde villain I will ever acknowledge #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/H8vmcCJ30Y
— Ira Snave (@IraSnave) February 5, 2023
After a moving speech, Melinda decides to give Layton a chance. Melissa rejects her friends views of Josh, as she thinks he is a “perfect fit” for her in her current stage of life.
The rest of Australia also can’t understand why anyone would want to be nice to you either, Melinda #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/9wgd3kCpMf
— Becky Williams (@BIGNECKBECKS) February 5, 2023
Layton's mates when Melinda walked in vs. when she started talking#MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/fFrEFFl9RP
— Slabberin (@slabberin) February 5, 2023
On to the wedding nights, Melinda sets boundaries in bed and in response, Layton decides to do some work. Melissa makes dick jokes about Josh’s Toy Story pyjamas — this show is sick. The next morning, the couple are spinning different stories: Melissa says they had sex, Josh reckons they didn’t.
Am I the only one who thought Melissa was the one who was fibbing about the sex? #MAFSAU #MAFS @MarriedAU pic.twitter.com/MkNXgXRaep
— Burney Wong (@Burndoggs) February 5, 2023
Before the wedding. Melinda: I've been single for so long I really want to find someone.
During the wedding. Melinda: EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM DISGUSTS ME. HE KNOWS MY MAMS NAME RED FLAG ?
Only red flag I see here is you hun #MAFSAU
— Lynn (@LynnMelia) February 5, 2023
Bring Trish back for Melissa and Josh only
Give us what we want! #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/SBe6JFCByE
— ????? ???????? (@DylanMatthews91) February 5, 2023
Melissa and Josh go to Fiji for their honeymoon while Melinda and Layton get whisked away to… NSW. Melissa is, once again, gagging for it. However, Josh has started losing interest. Melissa asks Josh where his head was at, then he reveals he lied about them having sex.
Melissa and Josh in Fiji for honeymoon is adding to the “the good couples get to go overseas and the trashfire couples go to the central coast” conspiracy theory #MAFSAU
— Steph the sarcastic sequin (@Steph_Simmons89) February 5, 2023
With the first dinner party tonight, things are about to get even messier!
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