The 10 Most Cooked Moments In ‘MasterChef’ History

This is it, fam. We did it. We made it through ten seasons of MasterChef Australia.

It’s been a whole decade of Matt Preston single-handedly keeping the cravat industry alive, a whole decade of incessant close-up shots of George Calombaris’ sweaty forehead every time he eats something mildly warm, and a whole decade of the other one. Gerald, I think his name is.

But now, as we’re on the cusp of the show’s 10th season, let us open the mystery box to the past and revel in the most absolutely fried, baked and completely well done moments of the show’s illustrious history.

Here are the top 10 most cooked moments in MasterChef Australia:

Season 1: The Croquembouche

Arguably the fourth most famous member of the show’s cast besides the three judges, this dessert has become a part of television history. It towers over any Pressure Test that has come after it, and really separated the cooks from the chefs – or the Poh’s from the Julie’s.

My Friday nights are like Poh’s croquembouche, and my Monday mornings are like Julie’s.

Season 1: Chris Serving The Judges An Entire Pig’s Head

I don’t know about you guys, but when I venture into the illusive world of fine dining (ie. when I eat anything that isn’t Easy Mac), I don’t expect to be presented with an entire pig’s head.

Yet and still, the first season’s third place-getter, Chris Badenoch, thought it was a bloody oinker of an idea and gave us roasted pig noggin on primetime television.

It was inspired by his ethos of cooking “snout to tail” which would be reflected in his winner’s cookbook should he have taken out the title. Spoiler alert: he didn’t, and he was sent home on the back of the dish because who the fuck wants to see roasted pig head on the front of Donna Hay magazine?

P.S. He eventually published a cookbook called ‘The Entire Beast’ because subtlety is dead.

Season 2: Marion Grasby’s Elimination

Look, I don’t like to throw around the phrase “greatest injustice in the history of reality television” too often, but here it’s more than appropriate. This is worse than Ricki-Lee, worse than Bree Amer and worse than Nick Cummins’ entire season of The Bachelor.

i’m sorry but as far as i’m concerned if you don’t think about Marion’s elimination from season 2 of masterchef at least once a week then we can never be friends.

— jackson langford (@jacksonlangford) April 30, 2018

Marion Grasby kicked ass her entire season. Literally, the whole season. In fact, when it came time for the QUEEN to head to her fateful elimination, fellow contestants said things like “there’s no doubt in my mind that Marion is going to win this competition, we’re all just gunning for second.”

In fact, when Aaron walked back into the MasterChef house instead of Marion, the rest of the contestants screamed “oh my god!” and “I’m sorry, we’re just in a bit of a shock” and “this isn’t a joke, right?”

I know now that Marion’s Kitchen is everywhere in your local Coles and Woolies and she is killing it, but I’m still adamant MasterChef gives her the trophy that was rightfully hers.

Season 2: Aaron’s Disgusting…ly Good Pasta

This isn’t a ranked list, but you best believe if it was, this MasterChef moment would take the cake as the most cooked by a mile.

As MasterChef ads spammed our TVs in 2010, showing Matt Preston throwing a contestant’s dish on the ground and having the plate shatter to smithereens, you best believe that the messy bitch that lives for drama inside of me was tuning in. It turns out it was Aaron Harvie who was the unlucky contestant.

“There are some dishes that are like freaky Frankenstein disasters,” Preston told Harvie upon taking one bite of his pasta. “And quite frankly, that” *drops plate* “is disgusting!”

After the ad break ended and the entirety of Australia recovered from that *chef’s kiss* bit of orchestrated reality TV drama, it somehow GOT BETTER. No! Preston didn’t think it was disgusting! He thought it was “disgustingly good” and the only reason he dropped it was so the other judges couldn’t taste it! What the fuck?! Huh! I love this stupid show!

Season 4: Whatever The Fuck Happened During Emma’s Elimination Episode

Nothing warms my cold, dead heart like a good reality TV friendship. Enter season 4’s Emma O’Shaughnessy, Ben Milbourne and eventual winner Andy Allen. While the latter two would go on to have the cutest fucking bromance in the history of kitchens, they once had a third member whose speciality was cakes!

Well, would you believe it was a cake that would send her home? Of course you would! This is reality television we’re talking about.

The contestants had to identify a whole bunch of cakes by look and taste to save themselves from heading to the next elimination round, and Emma was the first to fuck up. No surprises there. But, because Channel Ten production is a cruel mistress, Ben was the other contestant to fuck up and would be facing Emma in a cake-off.

Everyone was absolutely distraught by the situation, besides the judges who might be the only people to remember this is actually a competition. In fact, Ben legit offered to quit the competition so he wouldn’t have to compete against Emma! What?!

The madness doesn’t stop there. After the judges were like “lol no Ben baby what is u doin”, Beau, who has absolutely no dog in this fight whatsoever, steps out and says he will compete against Ben so Emma doesn’t have to.

BEAU MATE. YOU WERE SAFE. YOU KNEW IT WAS BLACK FOREST CAKE AND EMMA DIDN’T. GET IT TOGETHER.

Season 4: When Jamie Oliver Came And So Did Everyone Else

Not all special guest chefs get an introduction that feels as long as time itself, but Jamie Oliver sure did when he rocked up to the hallowed halls of the MasterChef Kitchen back in Season 4.

Three contestants – Jules, Tregan and Alice – were challenged with the task of teaming up and creating a better antipasto platter (rich people language for ‘cheese board’) than Oliver could.

When the three contestants found out they would be competing against Oliver they dropped to the ground in tears, as did every contestant looking on from the gantry. It’s just a shame they couldn’t – you know – whip up a better cheeseboard than him (?)

Season 7: WHITE. CHOCOLATE. VELOUTÉ.

It’s sort of like Voldemort for MasterChef fans. If you know, you know.

Season 8: When Cecilia Would’ve Been Better Off Serving Literal Turd On A Plate

I still can’t believe this was a real thing that happened.

Season 9: The Finale Dish

I literally have endless questions about this. When chef Kirsten Tibbals administered the dish finalists Diana Chan and Ben Ungermann would be cooking, it was a big old fkn pisstake when all they saw was a pear, an orange and an apple.

BUT NO! They were, in fact, three different layered desserts that were just MADE to look like standard run of the mill fruits.

At what point do we cut the bullshit, MasterChef? Who asked for this? Who has ever wanted this? When I dine and I want dessert, give me dessert! Don’t give me dessert that looks like something my body would actually enjoy. Don’t hoodwink me. Don’t bamboozle me. I’ve had enough!

Season 10: When Runner-Up Ben Served Deep Fried Fish & Peas As His Final Dish, Lost Somehow

Still better than ‘For Nathan xox’.