the bachelor recap tweets

Tonight’s ‘The Bachelor’ Episode Retold In Very Funny Tweets

Tell us you love Punkee without telling us you love Punkee. Sign up to our newsletter, and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. It'll mean the world.

We’re back for another week of The Bachelor mayhem! How are you? Good? Good! Me? I’m OK. Can’t Complain! (Actually, after this never-ending lockdown vortex we find ourselves in, I can!)

Tonight the promos promised some sort of drama from Jay taking Jimmy into the business lounge, which apparently set off the rest of the women in a jealous rage. Did this actually happen? Not really. They shouted and hollered but no one really kicked off. Boo!

In truth, the episode’s events were all rather tame. Jimmy took Ash on a date to a secluded lagoon along Sydney’s Northern Beaches, where she told him about how she almost died from a blood clot and he comforted her with a kiss and a rose.

Jimmy proved on the group date that he truly loves to try any extreme sports as he greeted the women hovering above a lake attached to a flyboard. Osher made the obligatory comment likening Jimmy to Superman, and my ovaries shrivelled up into my body.

The ladies then had to create their own superhero personas. My personal faves were The Incredible Hols, which was basically Holly dressed in green, hunched over, and doing a power walk that would make Kath Day-Knight proud. Then there was Sierah, who said her superpower was making her enemies piss their pants and you can do with that what you will. Jimmy was charmed most by Carlie’s Toxic Positivity character, scoring the lawyer some extra time, a smooch, and a rose.

Let’s hope that Sierah’s powers don’t translate, or Jimmy (and his pants) could be in trouble!

Tonight’s The Bachelor retold via very funny tweets:

The episode opens with Jimmy driving a speedboat along the Northern Beaches. Dance teacher Ash is picked up for the second solo date on a secluded beach, where they played frisbee, and relayed near death experiences. Classic date banter.

No one watching was vibing much chemistry between them, but still, Ash scored herself a rose and a smooch.

Group date alert! A selection of ladies met Jimmy at a lake for fly-boarding that would see everyone dressed as…umm, superheroes? OK!

Sierah chose “piss” as her superpower, while Carlie picked a character to reflect her kind nature. In a shocking twist no one could have seen coming, Jimmy picked Carlie for some private time.

They spoke about each other’s love languages and not much else, but it was enough for Carlie to get a rose and a kiss.

At the cocktail party, the ladies agreed to a pact to not grab Jimmy for a chat, instead letting him approach who he wants. However, Jay had other ideas, pulling our Bachy into the business lounge. The other women were not thrilled.

Jay played a sexy feeding game with Jimmy, making him remove an item of clothing if he incorrectly identified her selection of New Zealand cuisine. It was a recipe for a cheeky pash.

At the rose ceremony, Chanel and Madison were left rose-less. Madison? I don’t know her! However, spare a thought for flight manager Chanel, who will now have to pray she doesn’t end up on a flight that Jimmy is piloting for the rest of her life.