the bachelor recap tweets

Tonight’s Overhyped ‘The Bachelor’ Retold In Loose Tweets

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Tonight’s The Bachelor promos promised big things! There was going to be some shifty gameplay during a challenge leading to Jimmy kicking out a contestant and in true reality TV form…well, that was a load of BS.

This show is the reason I have trust issues. I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed. The producers truly must have been starved for drama in the house to make out like poor Ashleigh was somehow deserving of being chucked out of the mansion. I don’t exactly understand what happened, but it just seemed like a rather civil parting ways between herself and Jimmy ahead of the rose ceremony.

But I’m getting ahead of myself! Tonight’s episode began with business lounge key wielder, Jay, getting picked up by helicopter for a solo date. In classic Bachy fashion, Jimmy wanted to take Jay go-kart racing — even after finding out she had been in a car accident and was feeling nervous to get behind the wheel. Jay, my girl, no man is ever worth…going go-karting for.

Anyways, Jimmy and Jay are great together, have heaps in common, and I can picture her going all the way to the end. The group date was something a bit different, Jimmy selected the five women he had spent the least time getting to know and had them answer compatibility questions. That makes sense! Rather than respond themselves, the ladies spoke through a range of “avatar” characters — so that he wouldn’t know who was answering. By avatar, I mean that producers grabbed a bunch of actors from an improv gig and made them dress up as pirates, clowns, and wizards.

It’s bizarre moments like this that are the only reason I still watch this shitshow. Let’s jump into the tweets, shall we!

Tonight’s The Bachelor episode retold via funny tweets:

A helicopter lands in the front yard of The Bachelor mansion as Jimmy invites Jay on a date. They take the chopper to a lake where they jet ski while Jay is blindfolded. This is fine!

Despite Jay revealing she had been in a recent car accident, Jimmy encourages her to go ummm…car racing. They then share a beer together and realise they have heaps in common. She gets a kiss and rose. Crown Jay the winner, already!

Osher planned a group compatibility challenge. Five ladies who Jimmy has spent the least amount of time with are selected and have to answer questions through avatars to keep their identity a secret.

Ashley got some of the women offside for trying to answer according to what she thought Jimmy wanted to hear. The five women then wrote letters to Jimmy, and Ashley was awarded the win — scoring some private time with Bachy boi. After speaking, it was clear that their timelines don’t align, as Jimmy told Ashley that he wanted to wait to have kids, while Ashley is keen to have children in the next two to three years.

At the cocktail party, Ashley didn’t return with a rose. Jimmy arrived to tell Ashley that he didn’t feel a spark with her, they ended amicably, and then Jimmy sent her home in a limo.