konrad brooke the bachelorette

Tonight’s Intruder Bachy Retold Via The Best Tweets

Tell us you love Punkee without telling us you love Punkee. Sign up to our newsletter, and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. It'll mean the world.

Welcome back to another episode of The Bachelorette! Tonight Brooke and all of Australia fell deeply in lust with Konrad, and Osher yelled at four people to get the f*ck out because they weren’t giving us good TV.

OK, maybe not quite.

But four new intruders did enter the mansion tonight, while four old faces left. I was originally going to say “four familiar faces left” but for at least two of them, I simply can’t remember their names.

First things first though: Brooke took Konrad on the single date and I’ve never wanted to be in a throuple more in my life. The two were so damn ADORABLE on their motorbike-pamper-session date. From gently putting face masks on each other, to tenderly doing each other’s nails, to getting emotional talking about their feelings: it was maybe the cutest date in all of Bachelor history. Machine Gun Konrad is an absolute keeper and if he gets milkshake ducked, I will be devastated.

Carissa won some much-needed extra time with Brooke after the world’s most boring group date (it involved racing go-karts and doing laundry and untangling lights?!) but it left Brooke confused, wondering where the spark the two had on the red carpet disappeared to.

OK, let’s get right into the episode before I start crying while picturing my wedding day to Machine Gun Konrad.

Here’s tonight’s epic Bachelorette episode retold via the best tweets.

Brooke took Konrad on a motorbike date followed by a pampering session and the two got to know each other better.

During their wine and dine time, Brooke and Konrad opened up more to each other, both shedding some tears. Machine Gun Konrad is too damn precious and we are not worthy.

The group date was a weird Mario Kart race but without the fun. The contestants were broken into teams to race around the track, before folding laundry and untangling fairy lights as a test of… how boring this show could be? IDK.

Carissa won the solo time with Brooke, but her nervousness left Brooke searching for that elusive spark.

At the cocktail party, four new intruders made their way in much to the disgruntlement of our old Bachys. We were introduced to Millie, Will, Jess, and Luca.

Luca interrupted Kurt’s time with Brooke not once, but twice. The audacity!

Carissa gets into an anxiety spiral about Brooke, even though she has a rose and is safe. No one wants to deal with her.

At the rose ceremony, we say goodbye to four original Bachys who definitely existed at some point in the house. Their names were *checks notes*: Matt, Jess, Emily, and Bec.