8 Things That Happened On Angie’s Hectic Hometown Visits

Welcome back, Bachy crew! It’s hometown visits which means we know exactly what’s going down tonight: Angie meets everyone’s parents and/or family of some sort, and one super intense family member grills her harder than George Foreman tryna knock out the fat.

While last night’s episode saw frontrunner Ryan come under fire for his slip-up about applying for The Bachelorette last year, tonight’s episode saw our other frontrunner, Carlin, have things blow up spectacularly in his face when his brother dug him a deep, dark grave and spilled to Angie that Carlin had been working on his acting career previous to appearing on the show.

Also, in other news, Jackson is part of a family business. It’s hard to say, but I THINK they sell pies. But more on that later.

Let’s recap Angie’s hometowns episode, shall we?

1. Timm’s visit was first up and Angie met his family and his very normal, chill best friend Jackson.

Timm and Jackson are so close they have the names of each other’s mothers tattooed on their butts.

Australian men are very, very normal.

As it turned out Jackson was the one that was going to hardball Angie – the rest of Timm’s fam seemed to love her. Jackson and Timm’s brother took Angie aside to sell her two kind of contradictory Timm stories. “As much as he looks like Tarzan, he has a heart of Jane,” Jackson said, before warning Angie that Timm is an absolute Party Boy™ and that they like to party every weekend.

“Do you think Jackson is feeling threatened that this bright, positive influence will steal his favourite wingman and is therefore doing his best to sabotage the relationship?” my two-year-old son asked, peering over his glasses and putting aside his copy of Normal People by Sally Rooney.

Why yes, that’s a very good point indeed.

Angie questioned Timm outside the dinner, and Timm was quick to clear up that while he does party, seeing Angie with his family gave him a new clarity and when you find someone you want “more than that shit” (aka partying), that it will all stop. Angie warned Timm that if he’s NOT actually ready to settle down he needs to tell her ASAP, but that she believes him over his weird-ass jealous mate and they have a passionate kiss goodbye.

2. Ryan surprised Angie with a dog which was probably a good thing because Angie was still not happy about Ryan’s little white lie.

Angie questioned Ryan about why he misled her when it came to the whole, “I’d only ever do this show for you,” when he would’ve, in fact, done it for Ali too. He said he never knew it would be Ali but was asked to audition and so he did.

“I was living to work,” he said as a way of explanation. Yeah mate, as someone who also LIVES TO WORK, because these shows DICTATE MY WHOLE DAMN SCHEDULE, it doesn’t mean I’d bloody lie about whether I had applied or not for a show.

As they talked, Ryan had some real issues maintaining eye contact. But maybe it’s because he was seeing things…

3. Ryan was quick to pull his brothers aside to explain the mishap he had with Angie, so their whole family dinner was about Ryan’s brothers vouching for his character.

Forget the fact Ryan kinda lied – these guys were all thinking it was absolutely wild Angie could ever DOUBT their brother and his intentions, even if he did once nominate himself for Cosmo Bachelor of the Year, 2017.

Angie eventually tells Ryan’s family that she can trust him, and his mum does big, exaggerated yoga breaths about it. This show is honestly… so much sometimes.

Ryan finished the date with the romantic words all girls want to hear. “I am deadset falling for you so hard, just deadset on you, ay,” he eloquently said. “Ryan was here before the show, he’s here during it, and I think I can see him there after it,” Angie told the camera.

SORRY WHY ARE THERE NO ALARM BELLS HERE? I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, if there was a guy in my life BEFORE the show and then popped up DURING it as well, I’d be dialling 000.

4. We learned Jackson’s family owns a pie business. It’s a business that sells pies. Jackson’s family sells pies. They actually even run a business.

They may even be the first Aussie family to ever run a business in their lives. It’s so out of left-field, I can’t believe we didn’t know any of this sooner.

In case we forgot what the family made, Jackson first took Angie to his workplace, the pie-making head office, and served her up a vegan, gluten free pie which he politely ate with her to right his wrongs after his red carpet arrival.

He first puts his foot in it by telling Angie to watch out for his dad. “He wants me to end up with someone hardworking and driven, I don’t think dad wants me to end up with a freeloader,” Jackson explained, seemingly not realising how insulting this could come across.

Just in case we missed the memo, we were reminded that the family runs a pie business as they sat down for dinner.

Jackson’s dad, Mr Senior Pie, took Angie aside to let her know that he runs a very serious pie business. “There’s no days off in the family business,” he told her, as though his son had literally not just taken at least two months off to go on a dating show. He also warned her that Jackson needed to be with a hard worker and that’s not a trait you can just learn.

MR SENIOR PIE! PLS! Your son came on the show to date Angie, she hasn’t scouted him out and been like “Oh there’s the pie king of the famous Garlo’s pies, wonder if there’s a little coin I can make off that.” CALM DOWN!

After the interrogation, Angie tried to get Jackson to open up about his feelings towards her and he royally fucked up. “For me to quantify it I haven’t felt this way for a long time, I’m in uncharted territory,” he said, as though he was trying to solve an annoying maths equation.

Here’s an equation for you Jackson: Angie has three roses to give out, and four men. This means one will leave. Who will go home with pie on his face?

5. After Carlin took Angie to an F45 workout, Carlin’s brother learned of Timm’s BFF stitching Timm up and decided to be all like “hold my beer.”

Firstly, what is with these men taking Angie to their place of work? Like every time I go on a date, I don’t make someone come into my office and watch me write about reality TV for 12 hours a day. That would be psychotic! And anyway that takes up all my free time, so that’s why I don’t date*.

* not necessarily the real reason.

Jarvie, Carlin’s brother, basically drops in his one-on-one with Angie that yes, Carlin had been pursuing an acting and modelling career, and when Angie said “So he could be using [the show] for that?” Jarvie was just very calmly and politely like, “oh yeah, I guess!”

In the end, Jarvie tries to smooth things over by then dropping this line: “I think I definitely see a connection like this is more than what Carlin maybe went in for, he’s come out the other side with an authentic relationship.”

I mean, can ya blame a girl for needing a drink?

6. Angie confronted Carlin outside about the acting claims, and we got a Helena and Matt 2.0 scene.

Carlin tried to reassure Angie that he’s not in this for the hustle, and that acting isn’t ALL that important to him. Then he really lost the plot, telling Angie to put herself in HIS shoes because he could doubt her for coming onto a show like this when she had two shows under her belt already.

Yes, Carlin is the one we should be feeling sorry for here, apparently.

Honestly I can’t with men, grow up. The date ended with both of them going their separate ways and crying dramatically. Some could say it was like a very intense… scene… from a movie… like an act.. of sorts.

7. At the rose ceremony, an emotional Angie gave Carlin the last rose.

He took the rose, and then basically cried on her shoulder while telling her that he liked her “so much.”

8. And we said goodbye to Jackson of Sargents Pies.

No, wait, maybe it was Four’N  Twenty.

Next week: Angie gets emotional in the final rose ceremony, and it looks like she’s upset that she maybe sent the wrong person home.

God, bring back Ciarran, PLEASE, anybody.