The 8 Types Of Thots To Be Aware Of When You’re Tryna Smash
ICYMI, casual sex is great.
We live in an age where, with the assistance of our phones, finding an eligible stranger to have consensual sex with is as easy as the swipe of a finger. People who participate in such activities, I call thots.
Urban Dictionary defines the word thot as: “it can stand for ‘That Hoe Over There'” but people tend to play pretty fast and loose with its definition. I like to think of it as a verb, as well a term of endearment and empowerment, to describe someone on the hunt for the D, V or both!
Throughout your adult life, you’re going to come across a bunch of different thots. Good thots, bad thots, big thots, small thots — the whole shabang! I’m here to identify said thots, to give you a cheeky heads up so you know what you’re up for.
Disclaimer: some of y’all aren’t into casual sex, or sex at all and that’s totally cool and we respect your decision! Keep doing you, boo. xoxo
The Rebound Thot
The rebound thot is getting over someone by getting over someone.
It’s legit — a University in Missouri studied the idea of having sex to better your frame of mind with 170 of its students keeping a journal of weekly distress, self-esteem, and sex reports. The study found that having sex was a stress reliever for many and a totally viable way of blowing off steam. HEY-O!
A rebound thot is likely to bone and bounce, so enjoy the moment, but don’t be surprised if they don’t reply to your text after.
Most likely to: Deny your friend request.
Zombie thot is a stage-five clinger, or just someone you can’t seem to shake. You tell yourself it was just one, one-night stand but they just keep ending up in your bed.
They’re the person you see at the end of the night on the dance-floor, lock eyes and say, “yeah righto, I guess”.
Most likely to: Become your friend with benefits.
The Wholesome Thot
It’s easy to think your relationship is more than it actually is with the wholesome thot. They will look after you, be super sweet and make you feel all the good things — it’s not superficial, they’re just a really nice person!
They are, however, a thot at heart, so don’t expect anything serious.
Most likely to: Make you breakfast in bed.
The Drunk Thot
The drunk thot only gets thotty when they’re drunk. It takes them a couple of drinks to let loose but when they do, whoa boy, they LET LOOSE.
They’re the friend you lose in the club, only to find hooking up with a stranger on the dance floor. Get it, bitch. Be safe, but GET IT!
Most likely to: Lose their phone, wallet and keys.
The Secret Thot
The secret thot is someone who wants you to think they don’t sleep around, but totally do. They have nothing to be ashamed of, but due to the systematic oppression of being secure in expressing your sexuality, they don’t feel comfortable doing so.
We see you, and we tell you to thot the fuck on!
Most likely to: Be a freak in the sheets.
Ghost thot is the thot that will be out of your room before you wake up in the morning and for that, we are eternally grateful. There’s literally nothing fucking worse than trying to make small talk with someone the morning after, when all you want to do is put your sheets in the wash and Uber Eats some Macca’s breakfast.
Thanks, ghost thotty!
Most likely to: Be the greatest.
The Wannabe Thot
The wannabe thot deep down wants to enjoy the thrills and spills of casual sex, but something is holding them back. DON’T HOLD SHIT BACK, JUST GO FOR IT.
Most likely to: Be missing out on all the sweet, sweet sexy times.
The Reluctant Thot
The reluctant thot enjoys casual sex, but is always low-key searching for something with a little more substance — someone to spend more time with and potentially a relationship.
They’re also very happy to keep enjoying all the fruits of a single life while waiting for that special someone though.
Most likely to: Fall in love with a wholesome thot.
Happy thotting, everyone!