the bachelor recap

Tonight’s Bachy Challenge Airing The Ladies’ Insecurities Was Kinda Cooked

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Well, that escalated quickly. Tonight’s group challenge was intense, with the bachelorettes having to recount their deepest fears to score some solo time with our bachy. We’ve entered the emotional warfare stage. Put your hard hats on.

It kicked off with Matty J saying that he’s grateful he faced his fears following his heartbreak with G-Love by becoming this season’s Bachelor. And, you know, having 20 beautiful women fighting tooth and nail to be his rebound and score his man meat.

So just like Matty – but not really at all – the women he’s simultaneously dating were forced to do the same. Some most viewers found it uncomfortable to watch.

What did the lasses have to do for this challenge? Profess their deepest, darkest fears on a slab of wood. What a hot date!

Tara’s face said it all.

The girls progressed to scribe their inner pain to a piece of ummmm wood, in order to score extra time with our bachy. What has this show become?!

“I fear…this. This exact situation. Pls halp me.’

None of the women were enthused by the exercise. The least keen was Lisa, who Matty tried to corner and get her to admit her undying love to him. She didn’t give him much.

She prefaced her ‘fear list’ by saying she “doesn’t like talking about feelings”. Well.. yep, she’s fucked.

‘Kill me now. I don’t even want a rose. FML’

Matty kept trying to push Lisa into admitting she has feelings for him…any kind of feelings at all.

‘But you like me, yeah? You like me so much, yeah? You want me to be your baby daddy, yeah?’

She wouldn’t budge.

‘Nah dude. Not. Feeling. It.’

Lisa later went on to legit beat the shit out of Matty. I think I heard bones break. She hoped this might finally get him to send her home. (It worked. Yay for Lisa. You’re freeeeeeee.)

On to the most savage part of the challenge, the women are told that they actually have to read out their fears in front of the other women he is dating. Cobie volunteers to go first and seemed to be unprepared to have to confess her inner insecurities aloud in front of everyone, and you know, the entire nation.

Poor Sesame Street character Cobie starts to freak out.

IT’S LIKE SEEING ELMO CRY.

Eventually after bursting into tears, she reads out her list of fears before smashing them with her karate moves. Cos Channel 10 are heaps deep and she is ACTUALLY breaking down her emotion barriers. It’s practically Shakespearean.

*Mouths lyrics to Chop Suey!*

In the end, all the women read their feels aloud and then Tara was chosen for a solo date. Since Matty and Tara are 100 percent meant to be/will be together forever, then I guess it worked out in the end. They defs wasted too much Bunnings plywood.