Well, that was  A LOT to digest. The first episode of Love Island introduced us to ten single Aussies and the perfect strangers were forced to couple up.

The ladies arrived first and had their pick of da boiz. Things got awkward when no one wanted Josh or Justin, and even more awks as we found out that Millie and Charlie had already dated. Coincidence?! We doubt it.

We don’t quite know what to expect from the season but bring on the trashfire.

Here’s what we think of every Love Island contestant:

Natasha 

This beauty salon owner has a strange obsession with boats, even saying that a deal-breaker in relationships for her is if the guy she dates dares not to have his own boat. This woman’s standards are strangely specific but I respect that.

On tonight’s ep she got stuck with Charlie, even though she was his THIRD choice. But she made it clear to him that she was looking for someone more mature. Get it, gurl! However Natasha also reckons she came to Love Island to find someone to settle down with, so we don’t trust her judgement AT ALL.

Grant 

This electrician from Canberra seems like the villa’s biggest bogan. He’s really into his own body and says things like he ‘wants to find a wifey’. He’s basically every tradie you’ll ever encounter.

He does seem pretty loyal to his match Cassidy, but then again he also led all the men in rating the girls against one another. Maybe there’s a reason he’s last name is Crapp… not even kidding.

Tayla

There’s not much to go off here, as we didn’t see a whole lot of the radio jock from Perth in the first ep. We know she was a former Miss Universe contestant that likes to skip and seems to like Justin. Tbh, she seems like a total normie, which means she won’t last long.

Justin 

The token international model is here to tell everyone he’s an international model. He thinks he’s cursed for having such good looks and I really feel for him. Poor guy. I’ve started a Make-A-Wish fund in his honour.

He actually seems nice enough. Although in a bizarre move to get Tayla’s attention on tonight’s ep, he pretended to be a chimpanzee. Which umm sure, that always gets me in the mood.

Erin 

Erin is A LOT to digest. The pierced-up gal doesn’t hold back. She really likes her boobs and demands that her potential match have neck tattoos. She bloody froffs an inked-up neck and sure, what ever gets you goin’.

She waited until Eden entered to pick her man and proudly said she picked the best dude… in front of all the other dudes. Awkward. She defs isn’t shy and doesn’t seem too interested in protecting anyone’s feelings.

Eden 

This guy is going to be trouble. He bragged about sexing up a bride-to-be on her Hen’s Night, and gave Josh the sound advice that he needs to “be the asshole,” to Tayla to get her attention, which is some terribly toxic rubbish.

Although tbh I’m v impressed he has slept with over 100 people and I can’t even get a Tinder date.

Cassidy

This bartender from regional Victoria seems lovely and therefore I fear for her future on this show. She revealed that she doesn’t know how to talk to men, so this exprience will be a damn masterclass.

Cassidy just seem like a pleasant enough country girl and I’m concerned she’s going to be eaten alive.

Charlie

Charlie is a rugby player that is probs every Tinder boy you’ve ever encountered that sends you a ‘Hey,’ quickly followed by another ‘Hey!’ if you don’t reply. The guy just can’t take rejection.

He was paired with Natasha but said he was into Millie. Natasha and Millie both told him he’s too immature and he isn’t helping matters by starting conversations with women by saying “Hey, you!” What a gentleman.

Millie 

Millie’s the girl that you want to be your BFF, while you simultaneously seethe with low-key jealousy that she’s sooo pretty and doesn’t even know it. She totally owned Charlie in their chat on tonight’s ep, so I’m on her team.

She also runs around saving pigeons. She’s like a superhero for small disease-ridden birds.

Josh 

This guy. What a disaster. He gives his looks a 10 and his personality a 9.95. He compares women to sandwiches but has a face so forgettable that every time I see it, it’s quickly erased from my memory. He’s a plain cheese sandwich with the crusts removed.

Kim 

Intruder alert!!! This islander just squeezed into the final mins of the ep and says that she isn’t here to make besties with the girls and promises to bring drama. Hopefully she pulls through with the goods.

After doing a quick Google of her, it turns out she’s the only islander that is a mum. She has a two-year-old son and says she doesn’t plan on telling the men about him until she’s ready. More power to her.