We Asked People To Share Their Worst Dates & It Was Really Something Else
Going on dates is always an emotional rollercoaster: Sometimes you leave a date excited and hopeful for the future, and other times you’re basically breaking into a run and vowing to never date again.
Like, ever again.
In a world where you can now meet and date people through a simple right swipe on an app, first date stories are only going to get a little weirder.
We asked a bunch of people to tell us about their worst dates or the weirdest thing someone’s said to them on a date, and here are the results**.
** This may or may not convince you to stay single for life.
The pill-popper:
“I was 20 minutes into a first date, and I wasn’t even halfway through my drink, and the guy goes “Do you want an eccy?” And when I said “No thanks,” he popped his anyway! Didn’t stick around to see what was going to happen next.” – Yolly
The scratcher:
“I was on a Tinder date with this guy and he was super awkward. It was weird. He tried to hold my hand and noticed I had acrylic nails on. So he picks up my hand and says “they’re so sharp like a cat, scratch me”. And he insisted I do it, so I just scratched the back of his hand and quickly made my escape.” – Anon
The brutally honest:
“I had a guy kiss me once, step back and say ‘I felt nothing.'” – Sam
The second agenda:
“Once had a guy tell me his whole life story (including details of a nasty break-up with an ex) then ask if I’d be cool with getting engaged so he could get a partner visa.” – Anon
The protein bro:
“Old mate took me on a date to buy protein powder from the supplement store next to a Medieval Disco and then asked me to come home and watch his favourite movie with him… which turned out to be Diary of a Wimpy Kid. What a time that was!” – Kirra
The snake whisperer:
“I once went on a date with a woman who showered with her pet snake. I didn’t date again for almost a year.” – Anon
And the snake party:
“I once went on a date with a guy who talked a lot about his pet snake. He then followed up talking about it by saying, ‘Sometimes I get my snake out at parties and let people play with it.’
He got really confused when I burst out into surprised, uncontrollable laughter. I guess our senses of humour didn’t align.” – Tahlia
The hangover from hell:
“There was a date where I turned up to meet her outside her apartment, but she was hungover and in her pyjamas. She took me back upstairs and told me to sit at her desk in the dark while she got back into bed.” – Anon
The racist:
“I went on a date and after she had finished saying something incredibly racist I burnt the inside of my mouth on a potato wedge and had to have the next day off work.” – Tim
The non-compliment:
“He called me a slut thinking that would be endearing. He was very confused why I didn’t want to see him again.” – Anon
The empty promise:
“He asked me if I wanted to lick his arse and said ‘promise I won’t fart.'” – Anon
The unhappy bro:
“I once had a date with a guy who was doing his PhD on the theory that happiness doesn’t exist. He also said, and I quote, “I wouldn’t say I stalked her exactly… but you know…” about his ex.
Another time I went on a date with a guy who yelled at me in public on our second date because he thought I hadn’t put enough sunscreen on.” – Anon
The police statement:
“On my first (and only) date with a guy he got beat up in a park and had his wallet stolen and we had to go to the police station to give statements.” – Jemima
The one who didn’t talk:
“Went on a blind date before with a guy who wouldn’t talk. Thought maybe he was mute as he typed/texted me anything he meant to say. Then suddenly he spoke to the waiter to give his order and then went back to texting me.” – Anon
The secret creep:
“A man took me for coffee for a first date, then an hour later whisked me off to a fancy restaurant that he’d made secret reservations for despite us agreeing to just have coffee. After dinner he looked at me and said, “You could pass for 16, and that’s what I like about you.” – Danaella
