OY WITH THE POODLES: The Definitive Ranking Of All The ‘Gilmore Girls’ Characters

There’s never a better time to rewatch iconic ’00s series Gilmore Girls.

There is no show quite like it and this week the show celebrated 20 years since it premiered and the series fast-talked its way into our lives. Across the seven seasons and A Year in the Life revival on Netflix, there were many characters we loved, or even loved to hate and a couple we wish would just stop, so we decided to rank the most iconic characters.

FYI: We haven’t listed every single character because there are simply too many, but we’ve included those who made an impact on the series as a whole.

OY WITH THE POODLES ALREADY. This is about to get brutal.

Our definitive ranking of Gilmore Girls characters:

18. Dean Forester

Ughhhhhhhh, Dean. Dean is a big stupid lump of a human and was never worthy of Rory. And that flat, middle parted dumb hair?! Need I say more.

17. April Nardini

Every one hates April. Most of the reasoning for this has very little to do with the character itself, but what her sudden appearance does to Luke and Lorelai’s relationship. She ruined season six, even if that’s not entirely her fault. That being said, she’s still pretty annoying.

16. Zack Van Gerbig

Zack is just a waste of space. As Lane’s bandmate turned boyfriend turned (erghh) husband, he never treated her well. He’s moody, at times just flat-out horrible and seems like the kind of guy that women tend to settle for when they could do so much better. He’s certainly no Dave Rygalski.

15. Christopher Hayden

Christopher is not all bad, he definitely has some great qualities and has major chemistry with Lorelai. But he continuously gets in the way of her love life, can be a shitty father and if he had left after season three… it would have saved a lot of heartbreak.

14. Mrs. Kim

Mrs. Kim might be a tough mum to deal with, but she has moments of being a complete badass. The best example of this was when she organised Hep Alien’s first tour of well…her approved churches. But still she’s a bit of a killjoy, and was responsible for this nonsense sentence:

13. Logan Huntzberger

Logan on his own is charming, charismatic and endlessly witty, the only problem is he will always be compared to Jess. Next to Jess, Logan takes a few steps down. But Rory and Logan actually really complimented each other and we never saw her happier. I definitely have a soft spot for that Huntzberger.

12. Michel Gerard

What would Gilmore Girls be without our lovable rude frenchie Michel? Sure, he can be a bit of a downer, but he says what we’re all thinking. People really are the worst.

11. Jess Mariano

It’s a tough call to not put Jess higher on this list but let’s keep it real, he CAN be a giant jerk. From the way he treated Luke, to how he just left town without telling his err.. girlfriend Rory. He was a bad adoptive son and boyfriend but he did become a much better person in the later seasons, and while he’s occasionally a nightmare, look at that damn face.

10. Richard Gilmore

Vale, Edward Herrmann. Richard might not be the loudest character or one that often steps into the spotlight, but he’s a pillar of strength for the often wobbly family tree. Plus, his adorable relationship with Rory really tugs at the heartstrings.  *Sobs uncontrollably*

9. Rory Gilmore

While Lorelai’s humour is big and brash, I’ve always appreciated Rory’s subtlety and wit. But she has definitely made her share of mistakes — like the entirety of season six — and she can be a bit sheltered and at times ungrateful for her position of privilege.

8. Kirk Gleason

Kirk can always be depended on to burst into any scene and cause pure chaos. Whether he’s having lady drama or stressing over one of the 62 different jobs he has, Kirk being a mess is the only constant in this whole show.

7. Luke Danes

Who knows what Gilmore Girls would be like without the electric dynamics between Luke and Lorelai? They are complete opposites but fit perfectly together. Luke is loyal to a fault, can handle Lorelai’s many eccentricities and is the perfect amount of sarcasm and cynicism, making him one of the best characters on the show.

6. Sookie St. James

Long before Melissa McCarthy hit uber fame with Bridemaids, she was Lorelai’s BFF Sookie — and equally hilarious. The always bubbly and quirky chef is an amazing friend to Lorelai (who doesn’t always return the sentiments) and doesn’t get the credit she deserves. Plus, it’s M-McCarthy and she’s a deadset rockstar.

5. Dave Rygalski

Oh, Dave Rygalski. Played by Adam Brody, some may not remember him, but he was a recurring character on season three, and was Lane’s smart, sweet, and witty boyfriend, and original member of Hep Alien. Dave was perfection, until he moved away for college *cough cough* The O.C. He was basically just Seth Cohen in Stars Hollow.

4. Lorelai Gilmore

We can’t exactly list our faves without including the character that the whole show revolves around. Sure, Lorelai has her faults, she can be immature, self-involved and stubborn. But she is laugh-out-loud hilarious and built a mother-daughter relationship with Rory that sets a pretty damn high standard for the rest of us.

3. Lane Kim

Many would say that Lane gets the short stick of the series. Despite being funny, kind and loyal, she is always given second fiddle to BFF Rory, who seemingly gives very little in their friendship. What makes Lane one of the best characters is that she’s complex and she hasn’t had an easy upbringing. She’s constantly being pulled in different directions between her mum’s strict conservative roots and her aspirations for drumming and being a rockstar.

2. Emily Gilmore

Only barely losing to first place, Emily is a force to be reckoned with. She can get away with saying the most biting comments, and is far more witty and smart than she is often given credit for. The character’s likability  — in spite of her often nasty actions — is down to the amazing acting prowess of Kelly Bishop, and this is the role she was born to play.

1. Paris Gellar

Gilmore Girls without Paris, would be like eating a Pop Tart with no filling. She is a loyal friend to Rory and always keeps her on her toes. She is an inspirational, career-focused machine and has no time for boys, well B.D (before Doyle). Paris makes the whole damn show, and is an unrivalled source of hilarious takedowns, disdain for any/all social cues and generally no-fucks given attitude towards all around her.

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This article has been updated since it was originally published.