Real Couple Answers: What Actually Counts As Cheating?
Relationships can be the single biggest headfuck. There are too many rules, or not enough. You make your decisions with your heart, or your head or… somewhere else. Everything can be brilliant and breathtaking and irritating and devastating all at once. So how about we tackle one conundrum at a time right here? We’ve called in the big guns in Stace and Ty to answer all these questions – because they are an IRL couple who happen to also run intimacy courses and make some very spicy OnlyFans content. So yeah, they’re pretty damn qualified.
They’re answering individually because even though they’re a couple who are very into each other, they also still have their own opinions (healthy, right?). Plus, seeing how their answers differ might give you a fresh perspective on the whole ordeal.
This week we’re asking about cheating. Gulp.
It’s a topic that usually marks the end of a relationship (and the start of a terrible reputation), but how do real couples define cheating? What counts? Where is the line? And what happens when someone goes over it?
Here’s what Stace and Ty have to say.
What actually counts as cheating?
Stace:
“For me, cheating involves any interaction with someone outside the relationship that requires secrecy. Cheating starts when one partner is intentionally speaking with, entertaining, or seeing someone else and feels the need to conceal it.
“It’s not just physical; it’s about the emotional connections and secrets kept. If you have to hide your texts, lie about your whereabouts, or downplay interactions, then you’re crossing a line.
“Cheating isn’t just about physical acts like kissing or sex; it includes emotional affairs where one partner invests significant emotional energy and intimacy into someone outside the relationship. Developing feelings for someone else and sharing parts of yourself reserved for your partner is cheating. It’s the deceit and shift in emotional focus that hurts.”
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Ty:
“For me, cheating involves anything to do with another person, more specifically the opposite sex (in a heterosexual relationship), that you’re hiding from your partner or don’t feel comfortable sharing. This could be emotional and/or physical.
“In all of your interactions with other people, you should be asking, ‘Would I be okay with my partner reading this or knowing this?’ If the answer is no, then you probably shouldn’t be doing it.
“What classifies as cheating is a conversation each couple should have, considering every relationship dynamic is different. However, if you feel that your actions are overstepping the line, it’s likely they could be considered cheating. Open communication and clear boundaries are essential in defining and preventing cheating in any relationship.”
You can follow Stace and Ty on Instagram or check out their Under The Sheets Academy here.
Image credit: Supplied + Punkee