Tonight’s MAFS Weddings & Honeymoons Retold Via The Best Tweets
I don’t know about you guys, but I’ve spent the last 24 hours envisioning a show where Coco, my favourite new Married At First Sight contestant, is teamed up with Litney of Bachy fame and they both just run around causing chaos.
Unfortunately, that’s not on the cards just yet, so we’ll just have to make do with another episode of Married At First Sight.
Tonight we were invited to more weddings! I’ve officially attended more MAFS weddings now in my short, pathetic life than IRL ones. I’m not mad though, because it just means I don’t have to change out of my exercise tights, do my hair, and the ad breaks give me time to keep adding to my very long list of what I’m NOT looking for in a partner.
Tonight we met Alana, a headstrong school teacher with a ticking biological clock, who was paired up with Jason, a man who references his love of partying more than any kid doing O-Week after two goon sunrises.
We also witnessed the holy matrimony of single mum Jo, to single dad James. Jo’s a barber who had her self-esteem crushed by her ex-partner, and James does… something with cars. He really loves cars. “If you’re ever feeling down because you don’t have a partner, you can just jump in the Lamborghini and go for a drive and everything is good,” James told us, knowingly.
I guess it’s the same feeling I had when I used to have to manually roll the window down of my three-door Hyundai Getz because the air-con was broken. Freeing and sweaty.
And just when you thought the episode was over, well guess what! It wasn’t! Gosh, does this rollercoaster ever end?
After the weddings wrapped up, we checked back in with our couples as their honeymoons were announced, but not everything was rainbows and sunshine. Melissa and Bryce may have started with a bang, but they ended this episode on fragile ground after Bryce put his foot in it by saying Melissa wasn’t his “usual” type.
Thankfully, he kindly proceeded to tell Melissa that his first thoughts about her were that “she’s not ugly”.
Straight men are not OK.
Let’s get into it! Here are the best tweets from episode three of Married at First Sight.
We check in on our newly married couples and Sam watches on in astonishment as Coco weighs her hummus. Meanwhile, Booka and Brett continued to be the perfect couple and if they break up, I’ll cancel this show.
Sorry but I don't trust anyone that stops at 10g of hummus #MAFS #MAFSAU #MAFSAustralia
— ck (@ck_8_) February 24, 2021
BRETT AND BOOKA OMG – CAN'T DEAL! #MAFS #MAFSAU
— Brandon Atkins (@BrandonAtkins_) February 24, 2021
#mafs I LOVE BOOKA AND BRETT
— troiboi ? (@Troiboi) February 24, 2021
The experts go back to what they do best: matching people up for pure and utter chaos. First up, we meet cool teacher Alana who’s worried about being alone at 30, and party-loving tradie Jason who adores his nieces.
Alana in the playground at recess #MAFS pic.twitter.com/1yJYpiPgVq
— Kiera (@UnderYourPorch) February 24, 2021
Alana is not going back to teaching. NO WAY! #MAFSAU #MAFS #MAFSAustralia pic.twitter.com/X0iX8PTJ8I
— Married At First Sight Experts (@mafsexperts) February 24, 2021
Can we just recognise that being single at 30 or at ANY age is completely ok?! #MAFS
— Sonya Orlova (@sonya_orlova1) February 24, 2021
Then we meet Jo, learn about her trashbag ex, and get introduced to her new husband James, who made his first million in his late-twenties. Jealous!
James: I want someone to love me for who I am and not my money.
Also James: gets on national TV and brags about all the shit he owns. #MAFS #MAFSAU— Gozza (@Gozza08) February 24, 2021
The Lambo guy. Is he the 2021 version of….#MAFS pic.twitter.com/172dbAoA0I
— Megan Hustwaite (@MeganHustwaite) February 24, 2021
‘I’ve deliberately hidden my wealth’ okay Elon Musk #MAFS pic.twitter.com/OHepWNNEuh
— Kiera (@UnderYourPorch) February 24, 2021
Jo has self esteem issues so… we'll match with a confident millionaire.
?#MAFSAU #MAFS #MAFSAustralia pic.twitter.com/lF7P5U9YRM
— Married At First Sight Experts (@mafsexperts) February 24, 2021
The experts:
“Joanna has 3 kids”“James has 3 kids”
“Both they’re names start with a J”#MAFS pic.twitter.com/qVhMfsZhGx
— ????? ???????? (@DylanMatthews91) February 24, 2021
Well I'm glad the millionaire, ex-footy player, model and rock star singer have a chance at love#MAFS #MarriedAtFirstSight pic.twitter.com/HDvjS3kHHy
— The Don't Flatter Yourself Podcast (@TheDFYpodcast) February 24, 2021
Jo and James hit it off at their wedding, despite James’ choice in attire…
Do you really deserve to be happy if you show up to your wedding in a fucking turtle neck? ?
#MAFS pic.twitter.com/Vz7c2uqZzG— ????? ???????? (@DylanMatthews91) February 24, 2021
OK I KINDA WANT THEM TO WORK SO BAD #mafs
— daichi stan (@Runecraftings) February 24, 2021
My dad said James looks like Captain Haddock hahahha #MAFS pic.twitter.com/iqM3wsevIj
— Joe C (@JoseJalapeno_) February 24, 2021
Me right now, getting read to jump this guy if hurts Jo. #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/XWfHiT08AQ
— Wade Herbie Fully Loaded Ford (@MrWadeFord) February 24, 2021
…meanwhile, Alana and Jason were more nervous but eventually tied the knot with a polite kiss on the cheek.
#mafs why do these people keep saying this is their last chance? Are they dying?
— Ella Changwa (@EllaChangwa) February 24, 2021
“I’m ready to meet the guy I’ll be with for the rest of my life”. Wrong show, Alana. #mafs
— So Dramatic! Podcast (@sodramaticpod) February 24, 2021
Every single vow on this show includes the line "I've been hurt before" #mafsau #mafs
— Chris Evans (@Skualg) February 24, 2021
So it's taken Corona for the experts to start matching people from the same state? #MAFS
— Georgie Haberfield (@tehgeorgeh) February 24, 2021
Jason’s dad decided to throw his party-loving son under the bus in front of his new bride, referencing a time he had to pick him up from the gutter. Hot.
Who knew the hobby question would be so dramatic #MAFS
— Chloe (@chloealex23) February 24, 2021
We all need an embarrassing dad like Jason's #MAFS #MAFSAU
— Brandon Atkins (@BrandonAtkins_) February 24, 2021
They were making out Jason's hobbies were Irish Dancing or something #MAFS #MAFSAU
— Brandon Atkins (@BrandonAtkins_) February 24, 2021
My name is Jason and… #mafs pic.twitter.com/GHNIvWoysf
— Ben Shute (@Ben_Shute) February 24, 2021
#MAFS #mafsau what are your hobbies; pic.twitter.com/8rHhUc7jkn
— bob_with_no_job (@oh_dear_bob) February 24, 2021
#MAFS He's single – he's allowed to party if he wants to! What you would feel better if he said I sit at home crying and knitting????
— Gidgit VonLaRue (@GidgitVonLaRue) February 24, 2021
And James and Jo got cheeky, and we witnessed some of James’ very “middle-aged man at a nightclub trying to seem with it” dance moves.
HAHAHAHAH that dancing #MAFSAU #mafs #MAFSAustralia pic.twitter.com/SQ3ruH3puQ
— RINA, Mother of KIKI. (@INSAINTWETRUST_) February 24, 2021
I wish my eyes could have unseen that #MAFS
— Kiera (@UnderYourPorch) February 24, 2021
Me calling the police after being subjected to watching James dance #MAFS pic.twitter.com/Zna5j2vF9F
— PUNKEE (@itspunkee) February 24, 2021
Waking up to your friends' IG stories the next day… #MAFS pic.twitter.com/l6kht2PhQx
— Married At First Sight (@MarriedAU) February 24, 2021
The first round of honeymoons kicked off and things weren’t much better with Bec and Jake, who talked about trees before Jake went in for an ill-timed kiss.
My interest in this show can be aged by the rings of stains under my wine glass #MAFS
— FiRiosa (@fidalwood) February 24, 2021
I want to burn my eyes after watching that #MAFS
— sdimsim (@officialdimsim) February 24, 2021
Ungenuinely ? #mafs #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/4PJyWBCydf
— PENELOPE ANN (@mymoomoo22) February 24, 2021
Bec, whenever anyone looks in her general direction: ? #MAFS pic.twitter.com/Lrnt7IB2tu
— seapunk aesthete ? (@BiancaNeveXO) February 24, 2021
And Bryce dug himself a grave with Melissa, admitting she wasn’t his usual type but hey, at least she’s blonde!
The producers bringing in the honesty box #MAFS pic.twitter.com/28quQ2DS9E
— Weslee #TeamSymone #TeamBimini (@WSpark98NZ2) February 24, 2021
did they give this guy some kind of Fucking Idiot serum before they shot this? it's so easy to say "i don't have a usual type, but i think you're gorgeous" #mafs
— optimus primary school (@fruitandtie) February 24, 2021
Yes Bryce, every girl hopes to hear “well, she’s not ugly” #mafs
— Ben Shute (@Ben_Shute) February 24, 2021
Oh Bryce, here borrow my shovel and you can dig yourself into a little deeper #mafs #MAFSAustralia #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/AMEJ1fjj5x
— Bel ?♀️???? (@WhichWitchIsShe) February 24, 2021
Bryce: “I feel like you’re a little hurt by what I just said”.
Melissa – and the rest of us: #mafs #MAFSAU #MAFSAustralia pic.twitter.com/z1shigaWoR— The Purity Of Evil (@ThePurityOfEvil) February 24, 2021
The standards for the guys after this honesty box and the promo for tomorrow are at an all time low #MAFS pic.twitter.com/Eh5ovxgu5t
— Weslee #TeamSymone #TeamBimini (@WSpark98NZ2) February 24, 2021
More like Gaslight at First Sight. Am I right?#MAFSAU #MAFS
— ???̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲?̲? (@forlornfollower) February 24, 2021
Step in here Producers … anytime. Reassure her that Bryce is a dick and she is not to blame. #MAFS
— I Know It All (@davidapclarke) February 24, 2021
See you tomorrow night for more mayhem and don’t forget to join our Facebook group Reality Tea to discuss everything MAFS-related with us.
Man all these people need therapy #mafs
— jennybr5 (@jennybr5) February 24, 2021